


Down Below

by I_Guess_I_Write



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Anal Sex, F/M, Fjord is a bit of a cockslut...., I don't know where that came from, M/M, Oral Sex, Rimming, Spoilers for Ep 98, he's also a bit of a size queen..., i drew a picture!, not a dirty picture
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-12
Updated: 2020-03-27
Packaged: 2021-02-28 18:28:49
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 8
Words: 24,125
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23111737
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/I_Guess_I_Write/pseuds/I_Guess_I_Write
Summary: SPOILERS FOR EPISODE 98, don't read further if you haven't watched it. If you do, don't blame me.Fjord is dead and the revivify doesn't work. The Mighty Nein need another way to raise their Captain, and Caduceus' bond with Fjord might be the answer.
Relationships: Caduceus Clay/Fjord, Fjord/Jester Lavorre, Jester Lavorre/Caleb Widogast
Comments: 18
Kudos: 181





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I know I have a widojest fic to update... but I honestly couldn't help myself. Work is really boring and I have a super soft spot for some Fjorclay (found out that one of the ship names is TeaHaw and cannot help myself, it is that now forever!)

It didn’t work. 

Caduceus has a mild awareness of a ringing in his ears. His body is frozen, hand lying on a bloody, stationary chest. 

It didn’t work. 

He looks up into the panicked eyes of Jester across from him. He knows his expression must match hers. Eyes wide, tears at the edges. Mouth agape in horror. 

It didn’t work… 

Is it because the traveler isn’t a real god? No, Jester brought him back with the Travelers help. Is it because she now knows? 

Caduceus’s brow furrows further as he searches his bag for another diamond. He pulls it form his components and looks back at Jester, Fjord lying dead between them. He can see her desire to try again. It matches his own. He puts the diamond on Fjords chest and a hand covers his own. 

It’s Yasha’s. 

“There might be something blocking the magic.” She whispers into the space between them, and Caduceus wants to scream. He looks over at her, notices the tears and nods. He casts gentle repose instead.

His hands shake as he puts the diamond away. He swallows hard on the emotions that have bundled up in his throat. He swallows a second time, hoping they will stay down while he thinks. 

He hears arguing in the background and tries to tune it out, to clear his mind. The only solace he finds is that he had already raised Orly. But Fjord… why didn’t it work? The Wild Mother is sure to know. Yes, she would tell him what he needs to do. Fjord was her son as well. 

Caduceus sets the ritual up automatically. Eyes not wavering from Fjords body. It never looked so small. Tears fall form his eyes and he swallows once more, tuning out the Nein and focusing on the Wild Mother. 

A breeze caresses him, warm and comforting in the middle of the rain. He starts. 

“Is the traveler the reason for the spells failure.” He knows it’s selfish, but he wants the Travelers lack of divinity to be the cause. That is something Caduceus can fix. 

The breeze grows cold, almost disappointed and Caduceus’ face heats with shame. He knows Jester is a good and powerful cleric and her belief is what makes the spells work. He chews his lips and wrings his hands, actions he thought he had left back in his childhood, 

“Is Fjords…” his voice cracks with the swallowed emotion trying to free itself. He tries to force it down again, “Is Fjord’s connection with Uk’otoa the reason we cannot bring him back to us?”

There’s a flash of stinging cold, almost like anger at the mention of the serpents name, but it’s quickly covered by a warm caress that rustles through Cads hair. Yes, this is Uk’otoa’s fault, and the Wild Mother is not pleased about it. 

He wants to cry out into the darkness, how do I get him back? But he knows she cannot answer that question. Instead, after a breath, he asks, “Is the cloven orb in his chest the hindrance?”

The breeze slows, almost as if it’s contemplating, and then flows over one of his hands as a warm caress, then the other as a chill. 

Caduceus feels the ritual end and all the noise of the ship returns to him at once. 

Beau is holding Jester in a hug, piled against each other on the floor of the deck next to Fjord. Veth is standing close by, tears running down her cheeks. Caleb is between Veth and Jester, one hand on Jesters shoulder the other holding onto Veth's hand. Yasha is kneeling next to him, watching him closely, listening to his questions. 

She stands and offers her hands to him when she realizes he is finished. He nods and takes them. She helps him up from the slick deck. 

“Will you help me move him?”

Yasha nods as she walks with him over to Fjord. She easily lifts the body. 

He sees the panic immediately grip Jester and she starts to clutch him to her. A strange pant of possessiveness jabs through him. It takes him by surprise and he has to take a second to rid himself of the feeling. 

“Jester,” he says and his voice is harsh. That surprises him too, but by the looks on everyone’s face, he isn’t the only one it surprises. He swallows, “If he stays in the rain it might harm him, Yasha, can you take him to the Captains Quarters? I’ll be right behind you, we need to clean and dry him.” Yasha does as asked and he turns to follow. 

He feels a little guilty at his tone, and he hopes the other three can console Jester. He just can’t right now… that would just be… too much. As he continues to walk, he hears Caleb talking to Jester and Beau and marvels at how much the wizard has grown. 

He opens the door for Yasha. 

The Captains Quarters are warm and smell so strongly of Fjord it makes his heart hurt. 

“Not on the bed, Yasha, we have to clean him first.” He starts clearing the large desk in the middle of the room. He’s careful, these are Fjords things and will be needed when he returns. Once clear, Yasha carefully lays Fjord onto it. 

Cad stands quietly just looking at the gash in his chest. He pokes at it and looks in to see if he can see any hint of the orb. He looks up to Yasha, “Do you think we should?” And points at the wound. 

Yasha shakes her head, “We would need Jester… I’m not… delicate enough.”

Another wave of possessiveness flows through him at Jesters name and he is immediately ashamed. He know’s Yasha is right, and he knows Jester is wonderful. He sighs, for the first time in his life he wishes he were better with the living. He nods towards Yasha. She gives him a funny look, almost like she just figured something out about him, but she turns to go and the moment is gone. 

“Wait, Yasha, we should clean him first.”

Yasha turns back and looks at Fjord, “There is a lot of…” She motions to the blood and dirt. 

Cad nods and agrees, “It’ll be harmful to him if any of the dirt gets inside.”

Yasha nods and is ready to help, but looks hesitant. 

“I’ve prepped many bodies for burial, I doubt this will be much different.” He tries to be comforting and Yasha looks a bit more at ease. 

They work in tandem, carefully manipulating the half orcs body to rid him of the torn and bloody clothing. They know they cannot hurt him anymore, but that isn’t the point. They are still almost reverent when moving him, careful not to pull or pinch. When they are done with the clothing, they lie him back on the desk. 

Caduceus sorts his clothes in terms of fixable or not while Yasha goes to get the water. When Yasha returns with two buckets, a rag and a towel, he has sorted everything. She grabs the dirty clothing and departs, leaving Caduceus alone with Fjord. 

Caduceus swallows. He has to clean Fjord. He swallows again and offers a quick prayer to the Wild Mother before forcing himself to move. He gathers the soapy water and adds some flowers and fragrance to it. He tells himself it’s as tribute to the Wild Mother, deep down he suspects it’s because he wants to do something nice for Fjord. 

He feels the melancholy fill him as he starts cleaning Fjord of dirt and blood. The water is warm and the fragrance of flowers fill the room. 

Tears fill his eyes as he cleans Fjords chest wound carefully. He moves to Fjords face next, carefully removing any and all trace of his demise. He strokes Fjords hair from his face. It’s soft. He cleans down Fjords neck, his shoulders, back, arms. He pauses at Fjords hands, turning them over in his own. He cleans them thoroughly and brushes his lips over Fjord’s knuckles. It is a gesture he has seen from his father, and wouldn’t dare if Fjord wasn’t lying motionless, but it feels right, it feels reverent. He places both hands on top of Fjord’s chest, crossed, like he would in the Blooming Grove. He continues his work with his legs and feet.

Caduceus looks over his work and moves himself behind Fjord. He soaps up his hands and starts rubbing it into Fjords hair, gently scratching at the scalp. He works fragrances into his hair with the soap which he works into a lather. He rinses Fjords hair and then works some oils back into it, selfishly dropping some lichen in. Maybe, just maybe it will turn that white streak pink. 

When done, mixes up another moisturizer for his skin, one of oil and honey. He then rubs it into Fjords skin. He used to use honey in his work in the Blooming Grove, it helps preserve and sweetens the tea. Cad is looking to preserve. 

By time he is done his work, the Captains quarters smell like a beautiful mixture of Fjord and the Blooming Grove in its prime, and it brings Caduceus a comfort he didn’t know possible. 

“You smell of the Wild Mothers blessed domain more then the snakes cage, I hope it brings you hope.” He whispers in Fjords ear, “It does me.” He says as an afterthought, and cleans any mess he made. He picks up the dry towel and covers Fjords bottom half from view. He believes Fjord will appreciate him for it. He can almost be mistaken for sleeping, lying there on the table. 

Cad swallows and turns to the door. It’s time to get Jester and see what they might be able to do about that orb. He opens the door and there they all are. The Nein, dressed in cleaner, dryer clothes, waiting for him to finish. He is touched that they waited. 

Caduceus moves form the doorway granting them access. 

“I was coming to get you.” He tells Jester, “I think I might know part of what we have to do.”

Jester looks at him, eyes puffy. She sniffles, “the orb…”

Cad is a bit surprised she knows and then thinks about it. His surprise fades, Jester is much more perceptive than she lets on. He nods. 

“I… don’t know if… If I can… tonight.” 

“No, we should probably sleep first.” He puts his hand on her shoulder and she nods, then steps further into the room. Closer to Fjord. The rest follow her lead. 

Yasha enters last, handing him some dry clothes, “Orly is resting, but ship will be fine in Marius’s care.” She pats his shoulder and gets rid of the used water. 

He dresses quickly and watches Caleb set up the dome, when the magic takes hold, the group lets out a sigh of relief. They are all safe now. 

The Captains quarters are cramped, but not uncomfortably so, and honestly, Caduceus doubts anyone would rather it different. No one wants to let any other out of reach. They end up bedding down entwined with each other on the floor. 

Cad is warm, surrounded by his friends, the blooming grove in his nose, family safe, but still feels as if his heart is far away. His chest hurts at it’s loss and its a new feeling. This sense of loss… it’s new. It makes him toss and turn trying to settle. He has to move carefully not to jostle the others but when he turns in Jesters direction, he sees her shoulders shaking. 

Without thinking he outstretches his arms and pulls her into his warmth. She whimpers but curls into him and stills. They lie like that for a while and his is almost comfortable to sleep when he feels her turn in his arms. He opens his eyes to her. Hers are wet and red and his heart understands it too well. 

He nods to her and she scoots closer to him, her hands twining through his hair. It’s comfort. Her eyes close and her breath evens out. He closes his soon after and sleep finds him. 

Caduceus wakes in the Blooming Grove, as beautiful as he had ever seen it. His family are all surrounding him, happy and smiling, content that their home has been restored. 

Caduceus tries to match his family in their celebration, but can’t. He cannot remember why. 

There’s a stab of pain in his chest. He looks down at himself and hears his family gasp. His chest is bare and has split open. There is dark water spilling though the wound onto the ground. He reaches down and touches it, then brings his fingers to his lips and tastes it. 

It’s salt water… ocean water. 

The realization hits him as he watches the water start to destroy the grounds of the Blooming Grove. Everything it touches starts to die. Panic starts to flow through him as he watches his family run from the waters. He tries to cover the hole in his chest, tries to stem the flow, but as he brings his hand close to the wound, a snake starts to slither form it and twists around to face him. 

The snake is wrong. 

The snake has too many eyes. 

The grove around him is withering. The trees become waterfalls that quickly fill the area in which he stands with dark, dark, ocean water. 

Fear grips him. 

He swears the snake smiles.

Caduceus looks around for a way to leave the water when he hears, “Your heart is with me, child of the mother.”

Caduceus’ attention snaps back to this snake and he grasps it. Ready to pull. 

“His screams fill my temple, allowing my water to fill his lungs. He drowns and drowns, only to drown again.”

The water is up to Cads chest and he feels his body start too lighten. He feels less connected to her. It scares him. It makes him angry. He wrenches the snake form his chest cavity and it swells in his hands. It swells and swells until it coils around him, until it covers him completely. 

Cad lashes out at it, fighting against the grapple and only hears laughter in return. 

He goes to bite at its’ scales flesh, but is released. He finds himself floating in deep water, in front of a giant, yellow eye. 

“Bring me the orb, set me free, and I will release him to you.”

Fjord appears next tot he eye, naked and still bleeding form his chest wound. His eyes are wide and he startles when he recognizes Caduceus. 

“CAD!” Fjord shouts, swimming towards him. “CAD!”

Caduceus starts swimming towards Fjord as fast as possibly, arms stretched out. 

“Don’t listen to him Cad, don’t do what he wants, it’s not worth it!” Fjord is getting closer. 

“Yes, yes you are!” Cad screams back. He is so close. 

The eye focuses on Fjord and Cad watches as Fjord’s lungs fill with water, watches as Fjord drowns. Caduceus struggles to get closer, just to hold on to him, just to touch him, but Fjord’s body sinks deeper and deeper in the water. Faster then Caduceus can move. He screams as he watches Fjord’s lifeless form fade into the darkness of the depths. 

The serpent laughs. Caduceus looks to the eye, infuriated. 

“Soon, he will not resist my waters flowing into him. He will down as easily as he breathes, Free me and free your heart from such a fate.”

Caduceus feels his lungs fill with water.


	2. Chapter 2

Caduceus startles awake coughing the salt water from his lungs. He soon finds arms holding onto him and pairs of eyes watching him. 

He woke his friends. 

He tries to regain his breath while expelling the rest of the water from his lungs. Jester is running his back trying to comfort him. 

Cad finally stops coughing and blinks the tears from his eyes, He looks around at his wide eyed friends and says, “Uk’atoa has him. He demands release. Upon said release, he will give us Fjord.”

Jester gasps and covers her mouth. Caleb stands completely, contemplative. Yasha stares. Veth look too Caleb and Beau. Beau, Beau looks fragile. She meets his eyes and sees the fragility transform in to determination. He knows he can count on Beau, she will fight with him to get Fjord back. 

“Uk’atoa is lying.” Caleb starts. 

“Probably,” Cad confirms, “I don’t think he can give Fjord to us. That’s not how it works. His soul, once released, would go to the Wild Mother, where it would belong.”

“I also do not believe he intends for us to leave, alive, but if we kill him… Fjord will be released. We might be able to call him back then.” Caleb runs his hands over his face and looks to Jester. He nods to himself and looks back to Caduceus, “I guess the only question is, do we attend the peace talks before releasing the ancient evil being or not.”

Everyones eyes fly to Caleb, who is now looking away. Cad feels his heart ache. He suspects he and Caleb have that ache in common. 

Caleb continues, “We should try to rest up, we have… a lot t o do tomorrow.”

“Caleb…” Jester starts and Caleb looks at her with the softest expression Caduceus has ever seen on the wizards face. 

“We’ll get Fjord back, Jester, don’t worry.” Caleb says softly before turning away and bedding back down. 

Yes, Caduceus and Caleb do have that in common. They will suffer so their hearts are happy. 

Cad follows Calebs’ lead and puts a reassuring hand on Jesters’ shoulder before repositioning himself for sleep. He fears another nightmare, but is comforted by the forests and natural waters of the Wild Mothers domain. 

He wakes much more calm. There is still a buzzing under his skin when h=he looks at Fjords prone form, but there is a tentative plan and he will confer with the Wild Mother today. 

His friends are slowly waking around him, he smiles upon them fondly, grabs his components and leaves the room for the sunny deck of the Ball Eater. He sees the crew, tired form a long night. He nods his gratitude to them. He sees Orly walking around, sending orders, but he seems a little slower than normal. He detours to him and heals him. 

Orly sighs and nods his thanks, then turns directions to keep the ship going. 

Cad finds a relatively dry area in the sun and sets up his ritual. He breathes deeply and feels the commune take hold. He feels her presence. It comforts some of the unease. 

He sighs, “Does Uk’atoa have Fjords soul trapped with him?”

The sun on Caduceus’ face turns warmer as a cool breeze flows over the bridge of his. Noes and over his hair. There is a sorrow to it, but confirms that Uk’atoa has kept Fjord from her. 

“Was Uk’atoa telling the truth about releasing Fjord if we break open his cage?”

The breeze is a mix of warm and cool. It picks up and then dies. Uncertain, but doubtful. 

“Is there another way to retrieve Fjord’s soul from Uk’atoa?”

The breeze stops. It worries Cad, but it starts up again, slowly. It’s warm and close at his neck. It sends shivers throughout his body and seems to say, only for you. 

Her presence leaves. 

Caduceus has never wished he could speak to the Wild Mother like Jester does the Traveler, until now. Another way? How?

Caduceus sits there on the deck for a while contemplating what other option they have, but comes up empty. Maybe someone else will know. It’s time to return to the Nein. He gathers his things and returns to the captains quarters. His friends all look at him when he opens the door. 

“There, umm, might be another way to get him back.”

That immediately grabs attention and he almost regret saying it. He is met with questions he cannot answer. 

“I don’t know how, I asked the Wild Mother today, she said there was another way. She seemed hesitant, like it was either going to be very dangerous, or very painful. I think, I think we should look for it though.”

“So, like a back door?” Beau asks. 

“Do cages have back doors?” Veth asks. 

“I don’t know, maybe, there were, what, three locks?” Beau continues. 

“Do we know where the final lock is?” Jester asks. 

“Fjord did, but he never told us. Beau says. 

“He believed it wouldn’t be an issue, now, with the Wild Mother. There was no real reason to tell us.” Cad adds. 

“Except now he’s dead and we have to go get him.” Beau argues. 

Yasha looks at her, a sadness in her eyes and it takes some of the fight out of Beau, “I know we don’t have to… but… but we do. He’s family, he’s the captain, we can’t just let him stay there.” She concedes. 

“We’re not going to. We just have to figure this out.” Caleb adds. “So, how do we find this other way?”

“Beau scratches her head, “Well, I could ask around at the Cobalt Soul, but that means I need to get off the ship and to a library.”

“I can message people to try and find out. There’s Essek, there’s Diron, there’s…” Jester says. 

“There’s Vandran.” Caduceus says. 

“Do you think he would know?” Jester asks.

“ I don’t know, but he did follow Uk’atoa. He might have some idea.” Caduceus says.

“And I have messaged him before!” Jester says excitedly and it reminds Cad that Jester is Fjords favorite. Of coarse he shared his father figure with her. 

“You have?” Caleb asks

“Yes, Fjord wanted to make sure he was ok, so he showed me what he looked like and I messaged him. I can totally do it again!” She is smiling now, and Caduceus smiles a little too. It’s infectious. 

“I might be able to contact the Wild Mother for one question, but I would rather know what needs to be answered…” Caduceus says. 

“Are we staying for the peace talks?” Beau asks, “Because Caleb can open a circle and to one of the libraries, and I can run through, do research, and you can come get me when the talks are over.”

“I would rather not split up.” Yasha says. 

“The talks are important, especially now that we know what we do., but separating leaves us too vulnerable.” Caleb says while looking at Fjord, “We cannot loose another.”

“So what do we do?” Beau asks and the group grows quiet. 

“The peace talks are tomorrow. We check in with those and if it looks like it is going to take longer then thought, we talk with Essek. He owes us a favor. How many days are until TravelerCon?” Caleb asks. 

“Around 20.” Jester answers, she is fidgeting, nervous, and looks torn. 

“Ok, we go to the archive, probably the one in Port Damali, and we research for a few days. It will take the rest of the time to get to Rumblecusp, so we tell Orly to meet us back in Nicodranas when we leave the talks. With the orb off the ship, it shouldn’t be attacked. We should know more by then. We go to TravelerCon, and then we find this serpent.”

“That is a really long time Caleb.” Caduceus says and Caleb looks at him. There is sorrow etched in his features. 

“I know, and I am sorry, but I don’t know if there is any other way. If we knew more, maybe we could head off today, but we don’t know much. We don’t even know where this creature’s temple is. We can’t even release it, if that was the path we were going to take.” Caleb says

“I don’t like it, but we can’t take any chances. Last time we rushed in to retrieve members of our family, Molly died.” Beau says. “Research, I can do that. I hope there is something at the archive. Jester, if I write a message to Diron, can you get it to them?”

“Yes Beau, I can. If you want to do the same, Caleb, let me know. I will just read it, no extras.” Jester says, clearly hating that it will take so long. 

“So we find out as much as possible, then we plan and get Fjord back.” Beau says, looking somewhat optimistic. There is action they can take. Beau is best when there is an action she can take. 

“Are we agreed?” Caleb asks. 

One by one, the Nein nod. 

“Should we still…” Jester points at her chest and Caduceus takes a deep breath. 

“Yes, we can’t harm him more at the moment.” He puts his hand on Jesters shoulder for comfort and walks to Fjords side. “We have a few days before I need to re-cast. We.. shouldn’t rush…” He wants that orb out of Fjord so much he can taste it. It is a link stopping Fjord from returning. It’s a vandalism of his body. It’s a stain and a marker of the serpent who took him. He hates that orb and every second without Fjord is painfull. Rushing, though, rushing could make them loose him, so he forces himself to move slowly and gently. 

He runs his hand over Fjords forehead, smoothing stray hair from his face and looks too Jester. She’s watching him, and understanding in her eyes. It makes him blush. 

“How do you want me to help?” He asks her. 

Jester looks nervous, but gathers her resolve, “Well, lets just take a look first, I might need you to help hold him open.”

“We’re doing this now?” Beau starts, sounding very nervous, her voice is higher than normal. 

“We HAVE to Beau. This orb has to be out of him, we don’t know if Uk’atoa’s people are going to be back! Removing it will keep him safe.” Jester says. 

“I…I know Jess, it’s just…”

“I know Beau. You don’t have to be in here for it.”

“I’m his first mate… I need to be here to support him.” Beau has tears in her eyes again. 

Caduceus watches as Yasha steps up behind Beau and carefully puts a hand on her shoulder like she is unsure if it is welcome. Beau reaches up and holds it. Yasha relaxes and keeps Beau steady.

“Where are we going to put the orb when it is no longer in Fjord?” Beau asks carefully. 

“Caleb’s vault of amber?” Veth pipes up unsure if it is a good idea, “Only Caleb can get into it.”

Caduceus watches as something brightens Jesters eyes as she looks too Caleb, “Caleb?”

“Of coarse,” Caleb says softly as he pulls out what he needs. 

He watches as Jester smiles at Caleb softly and has a moment to wonder before her gaze turns back to him, determines. “Lets do this.” She says. He nods. 

He follows her lead. He trust her. She was able to put his aunt back together. They wash their hands in silence, mentally preparing themselves for what is sure to be a gruesome act. 

They return to Fjord, one on each side, and he watches Caleb put the pearl in front of her forehead. He taps her hand and casts guidance. She breathes deeply and looks Cad in the eyes for a long time. He breathes in and out a few times, then nods. 

She starts. Her hands are quick and agile. Clever, knowing fingers gently move organs out of the way in search. Caduceus has a moment to compare their hands and finds himself grateful that hers are so much smaller. He doubts he could do what Jester is in such a neat and gentle manner. 

Together they search for the orb, the rest of the Nein holding their breaths. It’s very tense work, Caduceus feels his back start to cramp up, his muscles stinging for movement, but he holds still and continues to look. He notices sweat form on her brow, but she is determined as well. 

“I see it! Right there!” She points out the location. Dread hits Caduceus when he finally spots it. It looks attached to his spine. 

“That’s a very tricky location, if something breaks… he might not be able to walk.” Caduceus warns and Jester agrees. 

Jester thinks a little and then says, “Veth, do you think you can dislodge it without damaging the bone?”

Veth looks to Caleb to picks her up to look. They are both more nervous being this close to Fjord’s body, but they stay steady. Veth swallows and looks over to Jester, she nods and reaches for her dagger. 

“Wait.” Caduceus says and everyone looks at him. “Can we clean the dagger, and Veth, can you wash your hands before putting them inside?”

Veth nods and scrambles down, pulling Caleb over to the wash basin. The two of them wash their hands and Veth hands Caleb her dagger. Caleb doesn’t need to be told, once his hands are clean, he takes the dagger and runs some fire over it. He holds it until it cools and Veth re-washes her hands out of pure nervousness. 

When she is finished Caleb returns her dagger to her and lifts her carefully. He gently sets her down on top of Fjord. She takes a position up on Fjords chest and looks at the both of them for confirmation. Caleb places the pearl in from to Veth’s forehead and they nod in unison. Veth nods and starts. Caduceus and Jester help as much as possibly, trying to make room for her to work. 

Caduceus’ back is really hurting from his crouched position now, but he dares not move. 

After what feels like hours, there is a squelching sound and Veth changes position. No one wants to ask how she is doing, but he can feel everyone’s intake of breath. 

Veth slowly removes the orb from Fjords chest and smiles saying, “Got it!”. She carefully gets down and cleans up. She washes both herself and the orb and then hands the latter to Caleb to put away. 

Jester starts repositioning his organs, putting them back where they were and Cad wants to cry. The relief is so strong. Nothing else was injured in the orb’s removal. Jester finishes as Calebs’s vault opens and the orb is deposited inside. 

“He would have hated this awake.” Jester says and Cad lets a small sob loose, it turns into a small laugh. 

“He really would have.” He tells her, and it makes her smile. 

He turns in time to watch Beau wipe her eyes and pat Yasha’s hand on her shoulder. She sees him and nods, saying, “I need to help with the ship, have to make the captain proud.” And quickly exits the room. Yasha gives him a comforting smile and follows Beau. 

Cad makes a mental note to check in with Beau, it’s been a long time since he last talked to her, and he can see his hurt mirrored in her so well. 

“What now, Caduceus?” Jester asks, washing the gore from her hands. 

He washes his own. “Well, Jester, I have to clean him up again, maybe stitch him closed. I’ll dress him as well, in his clean clothes. Then we find out what we can about Uk’atoa and a way to get him back breathing.” Just saying it that simply gives him hope. 

It looks to give her hope too and she smiles at him. “Thanks Caduceus. Do you need any help or would you rather be alone to work?”

“I will be fine Jester, thank you.” Cad says. 

“Ok! Caleb, Veth, lets go and start messaging people.”

“Ja, okay.” Caleb says as he looks over to Caduceus and Fjord once more. “Let us know if you wish for help.” He grabs Veths hands. 

“I will, thank you Caleb.” He says as they leave. 

The door closes, leaving them alone once more. Caduceus sighs, stretching his back. He looks back over Fjord and the mess they made of him. He gathers his herbs, flowers, and fragrances and starts his process over. He’s careful and precise. His stitches are small and even, and the room once again smells of a mixture of the sea and the Blooming Grove. 

He starts to sing and old lullaby while he works, and soon Fjord is washed, dried, mended and dressed. He looks over Fjord and leans down whispering, “Hold strong, we are coming.” And kisses his forehead before leaving the room for the sun drenched deck.


	3. Chapter 3

Caduceus helps the others with the ship as best he can. When lunch comes around, he feeds everyone. They take turns keeping Fjord’s body company, making sure he’s safe and doesn’t disappear. 

They all do something different with their time. Beau tells him of the ship, keeping the captain informed, she would say. Caleb reads to him. Jester talks and draws. Caduceus doesn’t know what they talk about, he doesn’t think he wants to. Yasha plays Fjord music. Veth tinkers. 

Caduceus, he sings. It was uncomfortable at first, being alone with him and not having a job to do. Then he remembered a song his aunt used to sing him about the seas that seemed a great place to start. 

They fix the shop and continue towards the peace talks. Jester spends as many spells as she dares messaging people, trying to find the answer. 

Beau throws herself into the tasks she can control, if she’s not running the ship, she working out. Whenever Cad tries to talk to her, she claims she is too busy. Caduceus understands. 

Caleb focuses on peace. He asks Jester to message Yussa a few time to help research possibilities. He even sends one to Allura to ask for aid, but then focuses on the task at hand. Caduceus is comforted by the knowledge that much smarter people are working on things. 

Veth and Yasha tend to wander not knowing what to do or focus on. They try to comfort their companions, and Cad does the same for them. 

By the end of the first day, Caduceus finally knows which question he wants to ask the Wild Mother, its really the only question he wants an answer to. He goes to the pillow fort he made in the crows nest and sets up his offering. He feels the spell take hold. 

He breathes her in and relaxes. 

“Where do I have to go to get him back, breathing?”

The breeze picks up and swirls around him. He smiles into it and starts to hear a voice then a few, overlapping, float by him on the back of the wind. 

“Into the darkness, into the depths   
Tread careful for it is full of missteps  
Down winding paths only traversed by the dead  
be sure to follow your string of red.   
Lead him onward but don’t look behind,   
Or your journey is over, the magic unwind.”

The breeze makes sure to brush by his face before it is just a breeze again. Caduceus bows his head and says, “Thank you.” He stays like that, head bowed in the crows nest of the Ball Eater, thinking about what she had replied. He understands the words, and he thinks he understands what he has to do, but he has no idea how to do it. 

He watches the sun set from the crows nest. 

When it is beyond the horizon, he descends. The ship is quiet, wood creaking, waves splashing. He sees Orly taking lead. He heads to the galleys to make dinner for his friends. As he walks in, he sees Yasha staring at the supplies, unmoving. 

“Everything ok Yasha?”

She turns to look at him and he sees relief in her eyes. “Caduceus, I wasn’t sure where to… start.” 

Cad smiles and she returns it, “What should we make tonight?” He says as he rummages through their supplies.

“Well, we have a bunch of mushrooms?”

“Perfect.”Cad says as he takes them from her. “Mushroom stew?”

Yasha nods. They start work. They work mostly in silence, they have cooked enough meals together that Yasha knows how to follow his lead. He works, the words echoing in his head. He knows he should tell the Nein, they will be able to help him, but it feels like he will be revealing a piece of himself. He’s not sure he wants to reveal that yet, if ever. 

“You seem troubled.” He hears Yasha say and looks up to her. 

“We are all a bit troubled.” He tries to deflect. 

“Yes, we are….” She says. He can tell she wants to say something else to him. He wonders when he had become so transparent and wonders if it’s something he can hide. He’s not used to having to. 

They finish chopping and add their vegetables to the broth. The water is back to boiling by time she says, “You seem particularly more troubled though.”

“Do I? hmmm.”

“It’s ok if you don’t want to… talk. I’m not particularly good at… talking. If you wanted to, though, I am offering.” Yasha says

“I… thank you Yasha, not… not quite yet.” He says, not quite sure about anything right now. She seems content with the answer and nods. 

They stay in companionable silence until dinner is finished. They serve everyone on the ship, makes sure to stop by and give Veth a bowl of soup while she’s watching over Fjord, and then sits with the others. Caduceus hates that Fjord is not sitting with them. It causes him to only pick at his stew, suddenly not that hungry. 

“Well, it looks like the talks will be tomorrow. Hopefully they only last a day, and we will be off again tomorrow to help Fjord.” Caleb starts the conversation. 

“Do you think both sides will play ball?” Beau asks. 

“I hope so, we still don’t know what the Assembly want. We just have to hope that they think they are going to get it by ending the war, for now. I hope there is a way to find a permanent end, but I don’t think that is going to happen in one day.”

“Has someone talked to Orly?” Jester asks. 

“Yeah, I did. He seemed almost relieved that we were going to be teleporting off the ship with the orb. He says meeting us in Nicodranas shouldn’t be an issue, but we have to do everything on a strict time schedule or we will not make Rumblecusp in time.” Beau says. 

“How many days does this schedule leave for researching?” Caleb asks. 

“If we leave for the Port Damali Library tomorrow, it will give us three days.” Beau says. 

“That’s not a lot.” Jester says doubtful. 

“No, but Caleb and I can do it.” Beau tells her reassuringly. 

Jester smiles at Beau and looks at Caleb, “You two are very smart. I sent a bunch of messages today. Essek was sad to learn that Fjord was… indisposed for the moment.” She spares a quick glance in Caduceus direction. “He said he is going to try to keep an eye on our ship. He didn’t know of a back door to Uk’atoa’s cage. Yussa and Allura both said they would look into Uk’atoa and possible locations for his last temple, just in case we needed it.”

“That’s good to know, thanks Jester.” Caleb says with a smile. He turns back to his food, “I just wish we knew more about what to look for.”

Caduceus bites his lips and moves his food around his bowl. He swallows and says, “I talked to the Wild Mother today.” 

This grabs everyone's attention and he almost wishes he hadn’t said anything. He forges on, “I asked her where I have to go. She said I have to descend and travel the path of the dead. I’ll find him if I follow the path and then can lead him back, but to not look behind me on the way or the magic will end. I honestly don’t know what she is telling me to do. No, I know what she is telling me to do, I just don’t know how?”

“I’ve heard tale of a spell that will allow your spirit to leave your body, as if you were dead. Caleb, is that something?” Beau says.

“There are a few, but they are very dangerous. The more time spent under, the harder it is to return to the living. I don’t know any of them… Yussa or Allura might, Jester, can you message them tomorrow and see if there is anything they might know, maybe give them a heads up?” Caleb says

“Of coarse Caleb.” Jester says. Cad watches a shadow fall over her face and then disappear. He wants to ask about it, but Caleb’s attention has turned back to him. 

“Are you sure the Wild Mother wants you to do this? It seems a little against, well, against your beliefs… natural order and everything?” Caleb asks. 

Caleb isn’t wrong. Using his spirit to rescue another sprit from the realm of the dead is very much against the natural order. All things die, and most things should stay dead. 

“I don’t believe it was Fjords time. I believe his time was cut short by Uk’atoa. If this plan went against the Wild Mothers will, she wouldn’t have told me of it.” He says, and it’s not a lie. He doesn’t say that breathing in a wold without Fjord feels unnatural and difficult. He doesn’t say that colors are less vibrant, smells less intoxicating, that he feels the Wild Mothers presence less. He doesn’t say that because that is too much. 

“Then we look into this, and only this. Knowing what to focus on will help us when we get to the library.” Caleb finishes his soup and stands, “I’ll go set up the silver wire, then start on the dome.” He leaves. 

It’s not long before the Nein finish dinner and he is left alone with Yasha, still pushing food around his bowl. After a while Yasha stands, collects the bowls and moves to wash them. She takes a few trips, and on the last one, puts a hand on Caduceus shoulder. His shoulders drop. 

“It’s hard to breathe” Caduceus says into he silence. 

Yasha tightens her grip, “Yes, it is.” she says

“Does grief always feel like this?”

“In my experiences, it does, when you love them.”

Caduceus slowly stands and turns to Yasha, her arms are already open for him. He hugs her and buys his face in her neck, A few broken sobs leave him. Yasha pats his back awkwardly, but doesn’t push away. She offers what comfort she can. 

“We will get him back, Caduceus. One way or another.” She says, and he knows what she is saying is true.

He pushes back, “Sorry Yasha, I… just…”

“There is no reason to be sorry, we are a tribe, we support each other, we mourn together.” She says matter a factly. 

Caduceus sniffs, then nods his head. She continues to the wash basin and he follows. Together they do the dishes. 

By time they make it up to the Captains Quarters, everyone is already bedding down for the night. Yasha and Caduceus follow. When Caduceus lies down, Jester curls up with him, the lights turn low and she whispers to him, “I messaged Yussa a few minutes ago about the spell we were looking for, he said he would take a look for it.”

“Thank you Jester.” He says, sending a small genuine smile her way. 

She returns in, then closes her eyes and cuddles closer. Caduceus wraps his arms around her and soon finds sleep. 

Caduceus feels the bright sun on his face and the warm sand beneath him and smiles. The seagulls are calling in the background and the breeze is cool. He opens his eyes to a perfect day on the beach. Jester and Beau seem to be playing in the surf, Caleb and Yasha close by, watching, sitting in the sand and having the surf lap at their legs. Veth, Yeza and Luc are building sand castles. Caduceus turns his head, lying next to him is Fjord, smiling. 

“Hey there Duces, nice nap?” Fjord says. 

Cad smiles luxuriating in the other mans gaze. “It’s a nice break, I think, for everyone.” He says back taking in the green form before him. “Why aren’t you with the others?”

“I would rather stay here with you.” Fjord says, extending his hand take hold of Caduceus’. 

It makes Caduceus smile and look at their entwined fingers. His hand moves against the other, fingers playing with fingers when he realizes a red string looped around their hands. He pulls his and back and the string still connects them. “What is this?”

Fjord looks down and seems to notice the string for the first time. He pulls his hand away and the string is still there, taut, no matter how far, the string remains taut. “Hmm, I don’t know, maybe our fates are entwined, maybe, we were always supposed to meet.”

The thought brings Cad comfort to his heart and butterflies to his stomach. He smiles and rejoins their hands. “Maybe it just means I’ll always find you.” He says, then looks around him. 

There are read strings that attach so many of his friends. Veth and Yezza’s is a thick red rope that looks almost indestructible, but also like it weighs nothing. There is one between Yasha and Beau that looks healthy, and one between Caleb and Jester that also looks healthy and bright. Caduceus squints in the sunlight, there looks to be something connecting Beau and Jester as well, but it is faint. He looks back to Fjord. 

Fjord moves Caduceus’ hair from his face and it makes Cad almost purr. He doesn’t know if he has ever felt such happiness before. 

“Cad, I…. “ Fjord starts and the sky starts to darken. 

The two of them look upwards and they start to hear screams of panic. They looks towards the sea. The sea is growing angry, the surf strong and unyielding. Veth scoops up Luc and together her and Yezza run towards where Caduceus and Fjord are laying together. The two sit up and get to their feet as the other four follow suite and run towards them. 

The waves swell and lap and the group has to back up further to stay away from them. Finally, below one of the largest crests, break a large, yellow eye surrounded by black scales. 

Fear grips Caduceus and he looks over to Fjord just in time to see the panic hit his face. Fjord whispers, “No.” Before a large black tentacle encases him and brings him closer to the eye, into the sea. Fjord is yelling and screaming and grasping at the string that binds them together. His hands go though the string and he struggles against the tentacle. 

Caduceus tries to run after him, but the Nein hold onto him, stop him from entering the waters. 

From all around them, they hear a voice, “Release me.” The scenery changes to reveal a coastline with three cities, a jungle and then the final location, the temple to Uk’atoa. The sky darkens and it pours rain down upon them until there is no air left, until they are under the darkened sea once again, until they drown. 

The Nein gasp awake at the same time, coughing, stunned. They look to each other and Caduceus is sure they just all had the same dream. 

“What the actual fuck!” Beau says when she gets air back into her lungs.


	4. Chapter 4

The Nein are gasping for air, wide eyed and uneasy. 

“Did everyone just have a really weird beach dream?” Veth asks

“What the actual fuck!” Beau repeats. 

Jester looks at Caduceus. He nods and Jester looks down at her hands. He glances at Caleb, who is doing the same thing. So everyone saw the red strings then. What does it mean? 

“I really hate the water.” Veth says and Jester gives her a hug. 

“I think we should try to get off of this boat as soon as we can.” Jester says. 

“Yes, I think you are right.” Caleb confirms. “The dome is gone, it’s morning. We should get ready for the talks, and then, we leave. We all now know the location of the temple. It might still be helpful.”

“We are not letting it go, right?” Beau asks. 

“No, the Wild Mother showed Caduceus another way, we research and try that first. We cannot break the serpent free… unless we know we can kill it.” Caleb says.

“Right… I’ll Go relieve Orly.” Beau says, getting up and pulling on her clothes. 

Yasha follows close behind. 

Caduceus stretches as the rest get dressed. He’s still trying to figure the dream out. Was that actually Fjord if the others were there too. Would he have held his hand? Caduceus hopes so, but guesses there really isn’t any way of telling. Not until they get him back. He starts to dress when he hears Jester send a message. 

“Hello Yussa, I think I might have something that helps. Yesterday, you said there were multiple, but are there any with red ribbons? Thank you!”

Caduceus blushes, he didn’t want others to know about his red string, it seemed too personal, it meant something. He wasn’t even sure what it meant, but it was Fjord’s and his. He looks away from Jester, he knows she is trying to help, and he knows Yussa needs the information, it’s just… Fjord doesn’t know yet. 

“Okay, Yussa said it will help. He’s still looking.” Jester tells him and all Caduceus can do is nod. He looks around and it’s only him and Jester. 

“Caduceus?” Jester says, quiet, unsure. It catches his attention, she rarely lets her exuberance drop. 

“What’s wrong Jester?” 

“Ohh, nothings wrong. It’s just… What do you think they meant? The ribbons.” She’s looking at her hands again. 

Caduceus swallows. “Well, I don’t really know. Maybe they tie us to people we are meant to help?” He says. “But I don’t really know. I’ve never heard stories of them.”

“But you saw them.”

“Yes, Jester, I did.”

“Did they scare you?”

He wants to ask why they would scare him, but when he goes to open his mouth, he realizes they did, a little. “Maybe a little, but I found it more comforting than scary. Did they scare you?”

She looks up at him a little worried, “I”ve been… I don’t know. If they lead us in the right direction, then I guess they can’t be too bad.” She’s deflecting.

“Jester.”

“I don’t know! It’s just a lot and points out so much more that I don’t know. I thought I would know things when I went out into the world, or at least I would have a better handle on things, but I feel as lost as when I first walked out of mama’s door.”

Caduceus hugs her tightly and she hugs him back.

“Jester, I am the wrong person to be talking to if you want to know things, especially world things. I’ve just left my Grove and all I know about the world is what I have experienced with you.”

She buries her head in his torso, “I know… I just don’t know if … if I should talk with them.” She says against the cloth.

“If its causing you pain keeping your questions, how could it be worse asking them?” He asks. 

She releases him and takes a step back. “I’ll think about it. Are you going to be ok?”

“I am always ok, Jester.”

“I know, so am I.” She’s got him. 

“I will be ok. I will be better when we know how to get Fjord back for good, but for now, I am ok.” He admits. 

“We will know soon. Thanks Caduceus.” She says and then leaves the room. 

Caduceus finishes dressing and starts his watch of Fjord. Caduceus sings to him. It’s just a whisper at first, but then catches strength. He makes tea while singing. The song is still a lullaby, it eases his worry. Fjord could just be sleeping when he is singing a lullaby. 

He spends time cleaning the captains quarters. There isn’t a ton to do, but Caduceus would rather do something then sit alone with his thoughts. 

He sits next to Fjord when the room is spotless. He holds Fjords hand. The spell keeps Fjords body from decomposing or stiffening in death, it’s almost as if he is still alive. Well, if it wasn’t for how cold his skin was to touch. 

He turns Fjord’s hand over in his, singing softly. He fancies he can still see the red string connecting them. Just thinking about the string makes his heart skip a beat and an unfamiliar warmth pool in his belly. The string only connected the two of them, he hopes that means they are meant for more… together. 

Caduceus sighs and looks away. There are too many new feelings, too much to think about. He looks towards their hands entwined and thinks there is time enough to explore when he gets Fjord back. 

Caduceus looks up at the clearing of someones throat. 

“It’s almost time, I… I think it’s best to put Fjord in the amber so we can take him with us.” Caleb says. 

Caduceus nods and watches Caleb set up. Together they struggle to place Fjord in, but they are careful and eventually place him gently. 

Caduceus watches Caleb close the vault and set it around his neck. 

“You’re sure he is sage in there?” Cad doesn’t doubt Caleb, but he cannot help but ask. 

“Ja, safer then alone on a different ship from everyone, anyway.” Caleb says, then looks at Caduceus. There is a sadness and an understanding in Caleb’s eyes. Caleb slowly puts a hand on Caduceus’ shoulder. “I… I know it hurts, but we will find a way.”

They stand there like that for a while when Caduceus asks, “how do you deal with it?”

Caleb looks momentarily surprised, but answers, “Well, Caduceus, this journey is not over and there are many things we can do before it is, so, we deal in coming up with the next step. IF we run out of steps, we will figure that out as the family we have become.” He pats Caduceus’ shoulder and turns to go. 

“I meant… how do you deal with all the… feelings? The feelings that pool and raise your internal temperature. Especially when you don’t… know… so much?” Cad swallows and looks away, “theres’ so much I don’t know.”

The room is silent. They can hear the creaking of the ship and Caduceus almost regrets asking when Caleb takes a deep breath.

“I am not the one to take advice from, for… this…I…” Caleb whispers and then sighs. “It’s hard to watch, sometimes, your sun shine so brightly and fill you with such adoration and desire… and know you will never be their sun.”

“Is that truly what you believe?” Caduceus asks, watching Caleb. 

Caleb looks over, “I believe a man like you deserves happiness. You have a chance, you’re gentle, kind, a little weird but you care, so much. You’re a good man.”

“For what it’s worth, Caleb… You deserve happiness to. You might not have always been a good man, but you are now.”

Caleb looks away, clearing his throat, “you won’t know until we have him back and you can ask him.” Caleb leaves quickly to end the conversation and Caduceus thinks about it. 

If he can get Caleb to open up to Jester, it might divert her affections for Fjord. The thought has a second to form before he squashes it, ashamed of himself. He doesn’t want to be Fjord’s second choice, he wants to be first and it’s not fair to either Caleb or Jester to meddle. They’ll find each other if they are meant to… just like him and Fjord will, if they are meant too. 

Caduceus refocuses on getting Fjord back. Whatever happens after that, will happen how it is meant too. He takes a deep breath and meets his friends on the deck already ready for the talks to be over. 

The sun is beaming down on the group of them and Caduceus shuffles from one foot to the other again. These talks are taking forever and there are so many half truths being said it is starting to really frustrate him. He wants nothing more then to shake these people and force them to agree on SOMETHING. 

He cracks his back and tries to focus, but his ind keeps traveling to Fjord, and that stupid red string. He is almost ashamed to want the string to mean that Fjord is supposed to be his. Only his. Once the thought enters his thoughts, he cannot dispel it. Caduceus tries to pay attention, but then his mind supplies a vision of Fjord tied up with that string like a gift just for him. It makes his temperature rise uncomfortably. 

He shifts again trying to refocus. These talks have made him more distrusting of the Assembly. He wan’t sure that was possible until now. But here it is. The Dynasty isn’t much better, unfortunately, but they are ebbing more sincere. 

Caduceus cracks his neck again and this time feels Jesters hand hold onto his. He looks over as she yawns and it makes him smile. He squeezes her hand a litt.e She sends the squeeze back. They are together, these talks will end. Then they will leave, together and get Fjord. It’s enough to settle him. 

The talks take most of the day, but end successfully. Caleb and Beau are pleased with the result. They all know there is more work to be done on both sides, but right now, they are over. Caduceus is eternally grateful. 

The Nein head back to the Ball Eater after a few words with both sides. Beau goes to talk with Orly as Caleb starts drawing the sigil. Caduceus is almost giddy with the movement after so many hours. 

“Guys, Yussa found something he thinks we need to see. He messaged during the talks.” Jester says and Caleb freezes. 

“Should we head straight to Yussa’s then?” Caleb asks. 

“We might skip some research and save some time. He might have what we are already looking for.” Jester says as Beau comes back. 

“What’s up?” Beau asks. 

“Yussa might already have what we need.” Veth says. 

“Really?” Beau asks. 

“He messaged me earlier saying he found something that looks like what we were looking for.” Jester says. 

Beau smiles, “Let’s go then!”

Caleb changes some of the symbols and finishes the sigil. It lights and the Nein enter the sigil to exit it at Yussa’s tower. 

“We forgot to tell him again, didn’t we.” Beau starts and Jester giggles. 

“Well, he messaged me, so he should be expecting us to show.” Jester says. 

Caleb smiles softly at Jester and shakes his head. They hear someone approach and the door opens. 

“You’ve been expected, please follow me.”

“See” Jester says with a smile. They all follow. 

Caduceus has butterflies in his stomach that get stronger the closer to Yussa they get. He swallows as the door opens and feels a comforting hand on his shoulder. He looks and finds it belongs to Yasha. He smiles his thanks and she nods. He probably should have asked Yasha about the feelings instead of Caleb. 

There will probably still be time. 

Yussa greets the Nien, “ I was expecting you a little earlier, but I might have what you are looking for.” Yussa leads them to a room that makes Calebs face slacken with want. 

“The Nein crowd around Yussa when he sets out a large tome and opens it. “I was able to locate a finding spell of sorts. It finds a recently deceased being who is connected to the person performing the spell by a string of fate.” He looks at Jester, “I believe that is what you meant by a red ribbon in your message. It was very helpful information because this fate string is key.” Jester looks proud of herself for mentioning it and Caduceus, while slightly embarrassed, is proud of her as well. “ It’s the connection that is followed, without one, the caster wanders and most likely dies.”

“So only the one with the connection goes on the journey?” Yasha asks.

“This spell is only meant for one, yes. If there is any hope of success, then it has to be the fate tied.” 

It seems like everyone looks at Caduceus at the same time. He swallows and speaks up, “the Wild Mother warned of the danger. Of many possible missteps. Do you know what those missteps might be?”

Yussa changes his focus to Caduceus, “Well, there really is no telling. You will be traveling in a realm between the living and the dead. There are creatures unlike anything on this plane. You will have a path and the string as a guide to lead you onwards, and you have your connection to the living to lead you out.”

“So there’s no guarantee he will be able to get back out when he finds Fjord?” Caleb asks. 

“Nothings ever guaranteed. Speed is a necessity. According to the text, you will forget even yourself if you spend too long.” Yussa is still talking to Caduceus. 

“May I?” Caleb gestures towards the book and Yussa backs away to allow him closer. Caleb reads it. 

Caduceus tries to stay patient. 

Caleb sighs and scratches his beard. He looks at Caduceus. “Your soul will be forced from your body to walk in the in-between. Every hour that passes, you will loose more of a connection to your body. Caduceus… it’s dangerous.”

“I knew it would be.” He says. 

“Yussa, are you sure this is he only one? There isn’t one we can all go with him?” Jester asks. 

“This was the only thing that was even close to what you are asking. If Fjord was in the after, then it would be much simpler, you have the magic that could bring him back, but you said he was trapped. This is the only way that I have been able to locate that would enable you to locate him while trapped. It’s the best option, especially if you have someone’s who fate has bound to the lost.” Yussa says. 

“Lets do it.” Caduceus says, tired of a day full of discussion. 

“I think we should wait and make sure.” Caleb starts.

“We don’t have the time to wait, Caleb.” Cad can feel the heat catching him and tries to calm himself. 

“He’s right, the only time we really have is waiting for Orly to get back to Nicadranas. Then we board the ship again for Rumblecusp.” Beau reminds everyone. 

An idea hits Caduceus and he turns to Yussa, “Would our bodies be able to be moved when under the spell, or would it make things more difficult?”

Yussa thinks about it, “Distance and time are different in the in-between. I don’t think you would have a harder time getting back to yourself if your body was moving. It should be relatively safe.”

“Then we sleep on it.” Caleb says and Caduceus wants to roar. 

“Why wait?” Caduceus demands. 

“So you are well rested for what is sure to be an ordeal. We cannot go with you, the least we can do is make sure you don’t rush into it tired.” Caleb tells him frustrated and it doesn’t sit too well with Caduceus. 

Caduceus can feel himself get angry, another strange hot feeling to add to the list. 

Yasha puts her hand on him to calm him, and he almost hates that it works, “Caduceus, it’s what would be best for Fjord.” She says quietly and it takes all the fight out of him. 

Jester takes his hand and he lets her. She squeezes. When he feels able he returns it.

“I. Don’t. Like. Waiting.” He says. 

“I know, but it’s what is best for everyone.” Caleb says

Yussa clears his throat, “I have a few spare rooms if you wish to stay, we can perform the spell in the morning.” Trying to break the tension.

Caduceus nods. Another night doing nothing… the thought etches a deep frown on his face. 

The Nein are lead to a few rooms, Caduceus bunks with Caleb and it’s tense. Cad knows he is acting out, but he cannot help it. They ready for sleep and the room darkens. 

“I… I’m sorry, Caduceus. I… know I would not be handling it this well if our positions switched. I…” Caleb says into the darkness. 

“No,” Caduceus sighs, “you don’t have to apologize, I… I can usually control myself better then this, it’s just… all of my emotions, every one of them, feel so much more heightened then usual.” Caduceus feels the tension begin to fade. 

“You asked how I deal, earlier…”

“Yeah, I see now I probably shouldn’t have…”

A dry chuckle escapes Caleb, “I don’t deal. I hide. Caduceus I… did something terrible that I can nver come back from… I don’t deserve happiness, so I ignore it, I do nothing about it, and I relish in the pain it causes me. I deserve the pain it causes me…”

“What about the pain it could be causing her?” Caduceus asks, genuinely curious. 

“What pain?”

“We all saw the string, Caleb. I am hoping, for there to be a string, these feelings that are… foreign to me… are shared. I want it to take both for the string to exist.”

“I didn’t think of it like that.”

Caduceus laughs a little at that, “It’s all I have been thinking about.”

There's silence, the two of them thinking about what the other said, 

“You’re a braver man then I.” Caleb says into the darkness. 

“I think you mean more desperate.”

“Why?” Caleb asks, curious. 

“You still have time. You can watch her and soak in her presence. You can still wait and see if she makes the first move so you don’t have to… I… I’m out of time. He’s gone.” Caduceus can feel the tears well in his eyes. “He’s gone, and all I can do now is fight for any little bit of time I can, and hope… and hope…” Caduceus lets out a tiny sob and then Caleb’s arms are around him. He leans into him until he feels strong enough to not. 

“I’m sorry I am prolonging your pain. Tomorrow morning, we will start you on your journey Caduceus. If anyone can fish him out of Uk’atoa’s grasp, it’s you.”

Caduceus sniffles, “I hope you’re right.”

“I know I am.” Caleb says and then returns to his bed. “Good night Caduceus.”

“Good night Caleb. 

Caduceus closes his eyes and is met with a dreamless sleep.


	5. Chapter 5

The next morning greets him. The sun is shining outside of his window. Caleb is already up and dressing. Caduceus rises and stretches. He knows it is going to be a long day. He nods at Caleb trying to ignore the nervous butterflies in his stomach. Caleb nods back. 

“I’ll see you down there, take your time.” Caleb says and then leaves. 

Caduceus swallows, trying to calm the butterflies. He dresses, organizes his materials, takes his staff and looks in the mirror. He looks like himself, a little worried, a little nervous, but still, he looks like him. 

He hopes Fjord is not disappointed. 

He nods to himself in the mirror and exits the room Yussa let him stay in. Jester is waiting for him outside. 

“I thought we should all eat something before the spell. There is food already in the kitchens, I came up to get you.” She smiles at him, but he can see the nerves in her too. 

He smiles back, “Sounds like a good idea. Lead the way.” He doesn’t really want to eat, but he knows there is wisdom in it. He’s not sure what he is going to be facing.

He follows Jester down the stairs and through the tower until they reach the kitchens. The Nein are all there, eating various types of food. Caduceus sits with them quietly and helps himself to some fruits. They taste like nothing. 

They all sit there in silence, eating the meal provided. The air is tense, no one knows what to expect, and everyone is too nervous. 

Yussa enters the room and everyone quickly shuffles to their feet, food forgotten.

“The ritual is set up.” Yussa says, “Caleb, I may need some assistance, along with something that can link Fjord with Caduceus on this side.” With the last bit he looks at Caduceus. Caduceus nods at him, fishing the symbol of the wild mother out of his bag. The one he gave Fjord so long ago, the one he forged. 

Caduceus hands the symbol to Yussa, “It will not be destroyed, will it?”

“No, it’s just to help anchor you for your return. We should begin”

They nod to each other. Yussa turns and leads him throughout his tower to the room they were in yesterday. The Nein all follow, and it sends a pleasant shiver through him to know they will be there, they will help how they can. It steals him for what is to come. 

The room is set up, there is a circle on the floor big enough for him to lay down in, Fjord’s body is already there. The circle is made of dark powder like material that sparkles when the light hits it. 

Caduceus steals himself. He steps into the circle. 

“Wait, Caduceus.” Caleb says stepping forward as he pulls out a pearl and puts it in front of his forehead. 

Caduceus sees geometric shapes before his eyes and then they are gone. 

“Thank you Caleb…”

“I am sorry it’s not more.” Caleb says. 

Jester is right after, “Blessings of the trickster.” And a warmth flows through him. 

He smiles at her, “Thank you Jester.”

Beau walks up to him and puts a jade bracelet around his wrist. “For, you know, good luck, or whatever.”

“Ohh, that’s nice, thank you Beau.” Beau sniffs and walks the other way. 

“Caduceus, can you come down here?” Veth asks. He bends and Yashsa helps Veth braid his hair. They weave flowers into it. 

Caduceus feels tears come to his eyes and wipes at them. When the ladies are finished, they hug him. 

“Go find Fjord, then come straight back.” Yasha says. Caduceus nods and smiles at them. 

“Thank you… I… will be sure to come back… with Fjord.” He says, and then re-enters the circle. The Nein encircle him on the outside. 

Yussa starts, “Caduceus, remember, follow the string to find Fjord, then hurry back. The faster, the better.’ Caduceus nods. “Lay back, don’t disturb the circle.”

Caduceus moves his braid around his neck so he doesn’t crush his friends work and then lays down on his back. 

“Caleb, please link the two of them with the ribbon.” He hears Yussa say and then feels Caleb take his hand and place it next to Fjord’s. They end up tied together. Caduceus doesn’t need to see the ribbon to know it’s red. He also doesn’t need to see himself to know he is blushing. 

He clutches his staff to him and closes his eyes. His heart is pounding in his ears and he tries to breath to calm himself. Caleb exits the circle. He hears the spell start. He feels the air take movement in the room, feels it start to swirls around him, feels the spell start to take hold. At first he only hears Yussa’s words, but they are soon joined by his friends. He breathes deeply and sends a quick prayer to the wild mother. 

“Please protect your children.” He says to her and he feels everything around him change. The wind grows harsher, colder. He opens his eyes. 

A chill goes up his spine as he looks around. Everything is muted. The colors are shadows of themselves. The figures, the objects, the world is blurred on the edges. His friends, just shadowy outlines in a circle above him. He sees the outlines of him and Fjord as well. They are darker in color then his friends. He wonders if it is because they are both in this realm now.

He moves his own hand up to look at and it is the same. Muted and fuzzy around the edges, almost as if he is a shadow. He waves his arm in space and feels the resistance in this world, sees his arm blur, the color and solidity taking half a second too long to catch up with the movement. He moves his arm faster, and it almost looses all stability, he can almost see his bone through the blur of muted color and movement. 

It frightens him, but there is one silver lining, right there blazing red is the string he needs to follow. He needs to hurry, he needs to find Fjord. He looks around himself and sees the path that was spoken of. It’s just a few feet from him. 

Caduceus tries to take his first step forward, towards the path and he has to look down. He is sinking into the land beneath him. Caduceus swallows down the panic that threatens to overtake him and pulls his staff free. He then uses it as an anchor to climb up, out of the muck that is swallowing him. He struggles to get one leg free, pulling it free with a wet, thick sound. He tries to step forward, upward, out. He places his free foot next to his staff, and then wrenches his staff free again. He places it back down and uses both to pull the rest of him free. 

He watches the ground fight with him, try to crawl up him, like it has a sentients about it. It wants to overtake him, it wants to drown him before he can even start! He takes a step forward and the world swirls around him, his other foot sinking a few inches. He struggles to free both, wrenching his feet free, taking small steps towards that path he saw, using his staff as a lifeline. 

He keeps the fight going, gaining inches towards that path he needs. He fights, thinking about Fjord needing him, thinking about his friend’s, his new found family. He will not succumb. He fights and feels the world tilt a little as his staff hits the cobblestone of the path. He breaths a small sigh of relief and pulls himself from the muck. He pulls and clutches at the path, breaking free. 

He lays on his back, catching his breath, clutching his staff to him. “Stay on the path Caduceus.” He reminds himself. “Always stay on the path.” He swallows. “Find Fjord.” He says as he gets himself up, brushing any muck from him that he sees. He takes a deep breath and steps forward, red string guiding him. 

Caduceus is unnerved by this place. Each step, even when on the path, feels like he is walking completely submerged in water. He meets resistance with every movement, and if he looks at anything too long, he sees it start to loose it’s form. He continues forward and has to detour from the straight path of the string to follow the path he is walking on. He hates the time those detours take up, but cannot help it. Better to loose a few minuets then to loose completely. 

He keeps trekking forwards. He sees the shadows of creatures and beings form in his periphery, just off of the path. He watches them move with him sometimes. Watches as the forms change from humanoid to something most definitely other. Sometimes they call to him, using his friends voices. He hears Jester scream just off the path that she needs his help. He hears Yasha anguished behind him, bleeding out. He hears Caleb angry and fighting along side Beau, calling for his healing. He hears Veth, from the shadows, weeping. He fights himself to stay on the path, to keep moving forward towards Fjord. He is consistently reminding himself that those voices are not his friends. 

Then he hears Fjord, to the left of him, in the shadow of a corrupted tree call for his aid. It is enough to stop him in his tracks. Fjord is injured, Fjord is dying, Fjord needs him. Caduceus almost steps from the path when Fjord tells him such, that he is needed, that Caduceus is the only one who can help him. Then Caduceus looks towards the string, the one that has him linked with Fjord, and notices it pointing away from the sound. Caduceus steals himself once more and moves in the direction the string is leading him. 

This phantom Fjord starts to curse him. It says such hateful things using Fjords voice. It tells him he is worthless and unloveable, will remain unloved, deserves to be alone. It brings tears to Caduceus’ eyes and makes each step away harder. 

These taunts last for what feels like hours, but Caduceus cannot tell. The light of this realm never changes. It is consistently dusk. Caduceus feels himself get weary. He rummages through is pack for some of the food he had packed, but anything edible has already turned to ash. He tries a spell to create food and water, but it fizzles. Panic strikes his heart and he tries another spell, nothing. He doesn’t have his magic here. He sighs and keeps moving forward, fear a close friend to his heart. 

The road is long, the road is tedious, and all Caduceus can think to do is sing. He sings quietly to himself, mostly lullabies. Those were the most sung in his house before they all left. Lullabies about the waters, crystal clear and flowing, about the flowers blooming, even in winter, about blue skies and singing birds. He sings to tune out the taunts thrown at him with his friends voices, he sings to not listen to the whispered promises of release, the promises of love said offered in the only voice he has ever wanted to hear them form. He sings to keep himself on the path. 

When he runs out of songs, he starts making them up, he sings about his family. He sings about his friends. He sings about Fjord. It isn’t long before the shadows along the path grow thick. He tries to tell himself it is because they have heard so few songs, they just want to listen. So he sings to them too.

The landscape changes as he walks. The shadowy plains turn to deep shadowed forests. Flat lands turn to hills, then steep mountain paths. Caduceus swallows nervously and his singing falters as the path turns into a shadowy cave. He remains quiet in this place, it’s dark and ominous, figures with no form float along the path beside him. The taunts and promises have stopped, everything has stopped. There’s only silence. He continues forward, deeper and deeper into this cave. He eventually comes across a large imposing door made of bars. The string follows right through those bars. 

Caduceus ties to pull the door open, no luck. It must be locked somehow, or maybe, it’s just too heavy for him to open alone. He tries to squeeze through the bars, again no luck. The bars seem to constrict as he tries to push himself through them. Caduceus tries to dig under the door. The hole he starts to make fills with the black muck, and it starts to crawl up his arms. He has to back away and replace the cobblestones he removed. He feels the desolation fill him. 

He collapses there, back against the large door and cries. He doesn’t know what to do. He has no magic to help him, he is lost, alone, and cannot find the one person he is tethered to in this world. His sobs break from his chest and become the only sound in this dark cave. 

“Caduceus?”

Caduceus startles and whips his head around towards the sound. He meets the eyes of Fjord. Relief floods him and he scrambles up, tries to reach for him through the bars. 

“Is it really you?” Fjord asks.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just an FYI, tags will be changing soon. :)

“Fjord!” He says desperately as he reaches for him through the bars. 

Fjords’ face softens and he starts to reach for him, but stops, doubt etching itself on every feature. 

“Fjord! Please take my hand.” Caduceus says, fear starting to claw at him that Fjord will turn and leave him here. 

“Is it really you Cad? Please tell me it’s you and not another one of Uk’atoa’s tricks.”

“It’s me, I swear.” Cad says hands straining though the bars, “I’ve come to bring you back.”

Fjord looks away, sad, “So have so many others with your face…”

That stops Caduceus. He withdraws his arms, “What do you mean?”

Fjord looks back up at him, meeting his eyes and it sends electric through Caduceus. 

“I’ve been lead about this prison by you, by… something that looks like you. I’m always lead back to Uk’atoa. I get away, and then you lead me back… I…” his voice breaks and he slumps to the floor. “It always looks like you… but it’s never you…” Fjord turns from him. 

“Fjord!” Caduceus gets to his knees so he is level with the slumped half orc before him. “Fjord, please… look at me Fjord. Please.” What can he do to convince Fjord that he really is there. “Fjord… if you won’t look at me, look at your own hand.”

Fjord shifts so both of his hands are visible. There, bright and blazing, is the red string. Fjord sets his arms back down. “What about them?” He says, not turning. 

“Do you see the red string Fjord?” Cad asks carefully. 

“Yes… it’s been there since…. I’ve been here… I think.” Fjord says, unsure. 

“Yes! Fjord, follow the string. It will lead to me, it will always lead to me. The real me. The one who is here to get you away from Uk’atoa. The one who wants to bring you back to our friends….” The one who loves you with every fiber, he thinks willing Fjord to glance his way. 

Fjord looks to his hand again. “It’s never lead to you before.” 

“No, it’s never lead to those wearing my face to trick you, before, because they weren’t me.” Caduceus wills him to understand, wills him to trust. “Fjord, please, look at me.”

He watches as Fjord bites his bottom lip, tusks poking out. He watches as Fjord slowly follows where the string leads, watches as Fjord’s gaze lands upon him. 

Caduceus holds up his hand, the one with the string clearly visible and attached. 

He watches Fjord swallow and slowly crawl closer to the bars. He watches Fjords focus switch between him and the string, watching as the string magically shortens the closer they get. “Caduceus…” he whispers. 

“It’s really me Fjord.” He reassures as best he can. 

Fjord reaches through the bars and connects their hands. Lightning goes through them at the first touch and something solidifies within Caduceus. He brings Fjords hand to his face and kisses his knuckles. He looks at Fjord, who looks exactly like Caduceus feels and he smiles at him. 

“Caduceus.” Fjord whispers again, a smile on his lips. Caduceus cannot count how many times he has wanted Fjord to look at him like he is now.

“We have to start moving. We have to open this door, we have to get back.” Caduceus says, instead of everything he wants to. He hates himself a little for his cowardice. 

“Y… yes.” Fjord shakes his head a little. “How.” 

Caduceus gets to his feet, reluctant to let go of Fjord. It looks as if Fjord is also reluctant. He looks at his hand when Caduceus lets it go and looks moldy comforted that the string is still there. Fjord follows Caduceus and gets to his feet. 

Caduceus looks at the door. It’s huge, and heavy, but the hinges are on his side. “The door opens towards me. Try pushing it when I pull, we only need it open an tiny bit to get you through.” 

“We have top open a manly half-orc sized amount.” Fjord corrects and Caduceus laughs in spite of himself. 

Caduceus looks over at Fjord, smiling, “Yes a manly amount.” He laughs and sees the mirth on Fjords features. 

Fjord smiles at him, “thanks for coming to get me out.” He says, before taking hold of the bars. 

“Thank me when I actually do get you out.” Caduceus replies, grasping the bars by Fjord. 

Caduceus has a moment to revel in how close they are, torso to torso, almost touching before pulling on the door with everything he has. Fjord pushes from the other side. Together they strain against the door and it finally gives a bit.

“It’s working!” Fjord says and it gives hope to Caduceus. He pulls harder. The door slides open a bit more, and then stops. They both stop and catch their breath. 

“Was that enough? Fjord, do you think you can squeeze through?” Caduceus asks between lungfuls. 

“Let me check” Fjord replies. 

Caduceus watches Fjord contort and try to squeeze through. It looks tight, but maybe he can make it. Fjord extends his hand to Caduceus. 

“Pull?” Fjord asks. 

Caduceus takes his hand and pulls. Fjord wiggles his limbs and torso, gaining inch by inch of freedom as Caduceus pulls him. Eventually his body breaks free from the stone and sends the two flying. Caduceus lying on his back, Fjord sprawled out on top, both breathing heavily. 

“Thanks Cad.” Fjord says, a slight smile on his face. 

Caduceus looks up at Fjord, wants to put his hand on his neck and pull him towards him. He wants to kiss Fjord with almost everything that he is. Instead he smiles back at Fjord and says, “I said not until we are out of here.”

Fjord chuckles and gets off of Caduceus, “that’s right, you did…” he looks around, “and how exactly do we do that?”

Caduceus sits up, “we follow the path the way I came.”

Fjord clears his throat. “What path?”

“The one your standing on.”

“Caduceus, there is no path.” Fjords voice is starting to sound a little panicked. 

Caduceus stands next to Fjord. He checks that his string is still connected. It is. “You don’t see the path?”

“No.” Fjord looks worried. 

“That’s ok, I do. follow me, step only where I step, and we should get back to our friends in no time.” Caduceus says reassuringly. 

“What happens when you step off the path?” Fjord asks. 

“Well, the one time I was not on it… the ground… tried to swallow me.” Caduceus says. “But we have each other, so it will be fine.” Caduceus steps in front of Fjord to start leading the way. 

“Caduceus…”

“Yes, Fjord?” 

“Please don’t leave me.” He says in almost a whisper. 

Caduceus turns to look at him. “Why would I come all the way down here just to leave you?”

Fjord tries to smile. It doesn’t sit right on his face. 

Caduceus offers his hand with a warm smile. 

Fjord’s smile turns real and he takes it. 

“There, we do this together.”

“Together…. I like that.”

“So do I.” Caduceus says softly and starts down the path back. 

Fjord follows closely behind, not letting Caduceus’ hand go, but also not willing to walk next to Caduceus in fear of stepping from the invisible path. 

Together they walk free of the silent cave and out into the shadowy mountains. 

“Does it all look like this?” Fjord asks. 

“Unfortunately.” Caduceus answers. 

“I was hoping it was because I was so far down…”

“It’s just this realm… Fjord?”

“Yes Cad?”

“Ignore the other voices when you hear them…”

“Other voices?” Fjord’s voice is starting to sound a little strained again.

“This… place…. It says things in the voices of your loved ones. Things that aren’t… things that will hurt you or make you stray from your path…. Try best to ignore them.”

Caduceus feels Fjords grip on him tighten. “What… what did they say to you?” 

“Many things, some true, some not, but all of them were…” Caduceus swallows. How does he tell Fjord that one of these beings used his voice to say that he would never love him… that Caduceus wasn’t worthy of his love…

“Hostile?” Fjord asks. 

“Yes, the voices are mostly hostile, but some are pleading and want help. I believe those are hostile too…”

Fjord just grunts and acknowledgement and they continue further. 

They are a few hours into their trek when the first voices start. Caduceus doesn’t hear them, but he feels Fjord freeze and then ask, “Is everything ok Cad?”

“Yes Fjord, what’s wrong?”

Fjord almost pulls his hand away when he says, “I… I though you…”

Caduceus pulls Fjord closer to him, “Don’t listen to the voices Fjord.”

“Cad… Caduceus, why won’t you look at me?” Fjord asks.

Caduceus almost turns around, and then he remembers part of the warning of the Wild Mother. ‘Lead him onwards but don’t look behind, Or your journey is over, the magic unwind.’ And he curses himself. He forgot to tell Fjord that they cannot look backwards. 

“Fjord, you have to listen to me. Ok, do you hear me?” 

“I hear two of you Caduceus.”

“Fjord, I’m going to put you in front of me, but don’t look at me… promise?” Caduceus says. 

“What if I step from the path?” He asks.

“I’ll make sure you don’t… please don’t look behind you.” Caduceus says as he maneuvers Fjord around him. 

Fjord is stiff and shaking, but allows himself to be moved. When he is directly in front of Caduceus, he starts to turn and Caduceus has to hold his chin to keep looking forward. He leans down, close to Fjords ear. 

“Can you tell the difference between the two voices now?” He asks and tries to ignore the shiver that runs through Fjord. 

“Y… Yes.” Fjord says. 

“Part of this spell, the one that allows me here to find you, is that we cannot look behind us. If we do, the spell fails and we are both stuck here. Do you understand?” 

“If I look behind… we are both stuck here?” Fjord says slowly

“Yes.”

“Why?”

Caduceus smiles against Fjords skin, “Why is magic ever the way it is?” Caduceus says. 

“Good point.” Fjord says as he backs into Caduceus’ space. 

Caduceus wraps his hands around Fjord and hugs him. “We can continue this way, my leading you from behind, or we can switch places again. Which would you rather?” He asks. 

Fjord settles into his arms and thinks. “If we walk like this, I look into the abyss, I see only shadows, I don’t even see a path. If we walk the other way, I at least see you. I think I would like the other way.”

Caduceus nuzzles agains his neck. “Ok, trust me. I will not lead us astray and I will not abandon you. You need to trust me, and you need to ignore the voices.” 

Fjord melts into Caduceus and nods. “Don’t let go.”

“Never.” Caduceus says, and then manurers them back to their original positions.

“Caduceus…”

“Yes?” Caduceus replies.

“The real Fjord is not behind you… I’m over here.” Fjords voice calls from his left.

Caduceus knows it’s a trick, he refocuses on the road.

“He’s just a shadow of me Caduceus, you bring him, and I die. You bring him, and your friends die. Just look at him. He’s not real.”

Caduceus breathes. He squeezes Fjords hand and he feels Fjord come closer behind him. 

“Are they talking to you now?” Fjord asks. “They don’t seem to ever shut up.”

“They are…” Caduceus says and there is an overwhelming need to look behind him. His mind supplies him with images of a not quiet right Fjord. Or a Fjord made of shadow and malice. Of a Fjord that would turn to smoke and soot if he held him. Caduceus shakes his head to rid it of the images. He stops on his path and reaches behind him with his other hand. Fjord takes it automatically and Caduceus pulls him close. He can feel the half-orc’s body behind him, solid and it helps. 

They both stand there and breath for a little while. The voices dissipate after calling him a fool, but now, it’s quiet. Caduceus releases one of Fjords hands and steps forward, renewed. 

They continue further and Caduceus can feel Fjord flinch, the voices are back. He squeezes Fjord’s hand and starts to sing. He sings his lullabies, sings loud enough for Fjord to hear. He’s a little embarrassed, but he tries. He has sung to Fjords body, he might as well sing to Fjords soul. 

He feels Fjord squeeze his hand and continues to sing. 

They make it past the dark forests and are almost to where Caduceus began his journey. Caduceus is almost through with all he lullabies he knows, and wonders if Fjord would mind a repeat… 

“Caduceus?”

Caduceus slows and squeezes Fjords hand before saying, “Yes, Fjord?”

“Why do I know these songs?” Fjord asks. 

“I believe they are common.” Caduceus says. 

“Maybe, but… lullabies are rarely sung in orphanages.” Fjord says.

“Lullabies are the majority of what I know.” Caduceus says. “They were the majority of what was sang in my house.”

“Not many songs were sung in the orphanage. I’m not sure I can remember one. The only songs I know are sea shanties.” Fjord laughs a little and it’s nice. 

“Will you sing one for me?” Caduceus asks. “We still have a ways to go.”

“They are repetitive, you can join in on the refrain after sung a few times. It’s how they work.” Fjord says. 

“I would love to join you.” Caduceus says. 

Fjord starts to sing. It warms Caduceus to the core, listening to him. He starts quiet, and stumbles around some of the words, but he gets a handle on it and after a little, sings strong. He’s right, of coarse, the song is repetitive and after a little, Caduceus adds his voice to the melody.

They sing, and they laugh as they travel the desolate grey world, ignoring the shadows, staying on the path. Caduceus feels as light as he ever has and he almost forgets where he is, almost forgets what he should be looking for. 

Caduceus shakes his head and stops singing to look around him. Is this where he climbed out?

“Caduceus?” Fjord says noticing the change. “What’s wrong?”

“I just remembered, I don’t…. Know how to get back….” Caduceus says. 

“What?” Fjord says, “Wait… What? I thought we were walking the path and it would end at the exit…”

“I don’t know. This looks like where I started… but, I cannot be sure. The spell never outlined how to return.” Caduceus says. 

“You performed a spell to come to this place without knowing how to get back. Cad, that seems a bit brash for you.”

Caduceus closes his eyes, Fjord’s not wrong, this whole thing has been a bit brash… but he needed to get Fjord back… “I needed you back…”

“Caduceus…” Fjord says but then goes silent. “What did the spell say?”

Caduceus tries to remember, but the memories are soft, fading… “I… I don’t remember exactly… something about a connection to the living?” 

“Ok,” Fjord says. “Do you have a connection, did someone give something to you?” He tries to look Caduceus over, see if there is anything out of the ordinary…

Caduceus does the same, he looks at himself. There is something in the back of his brain, something, if he can just reach it. Something about friends. Something about goodbyes. Caduceus touches his hair, free flowing in the not wind that moves the shadow. There was a braid… wasn’t there?

“Caduceus?” Fjord says, a mild note of alarm in his voice. 

“What’s wrong Fjord?” He asks. 

“I know we have friends, I just… I can’t remember them right now….” Fjord says. 

Friends. His friends gave him something… some intangible, others… others… 

“Caduceus, why can’t I remember our friends?” Fjord asks. 

“Because this place makes you forget…” Caduceus replies, and he cannot remember how he knows, but he does. “Fjord, I need you to hold on to me and not let go, I need my hand.” 

Fjord does so with no question, he crowds up against Caduceus and puts his arms around him. “I still remember you, though.” Fjord says against his coat. 

Caduceus’ heart beats a little faster at that, but he pushes it out of his mind and tries to focus. He looks at his hands. The blazing red string following behind him to Fjord, calms his nerves, at least he has Fjord if nothing else. He turns his hands over, looking over one then the other, then to his arms, but stops. He notices something that doesn’t fit. He’s wearing a bracelet. Why would he wear a bracelet and gloves… He wouldn’t… not unless it was given to him.

“Fjord, do you remember this bracelet?” He shows Fjord his wrist.

“Cad why would you wear a bracelet with gloves?” Fjord says 

“Exactly. Who would have given me this bracelet, they are the key, we have to remember them.” Caduceus says, and once said, knows that is the truth. 

“Jade…” Fjord says, “There is something special about it being jade, but whenever I think about it, all I am coming up with is blue…”

“Blue… this bracelet was given… for… for good luck, or whatever…” He says and a vision of a woman in blue monks robes comes to mind. 

“Beau.” Fjord says. “Beauregard gave that to you.”

“Yes, she did.” Caduceus smiles. “And she might have just saved us by doing so. Fjord, I need you to think of Beau, try to remember anything about her.”

“She’s my first mate, my work out partner, she challenges me and makes me stronger.” Fjord says. 

Caduceus remembers Beau, remembers how much she has grown, remembers how brilliant she is, and remembers how much she cares, and when he remembers her, he remembers them all. Caduceus looks up from his hands and sees a glow, it’s not too far. 

“Fjord! Do you see that?” He says pointing. 

Fjord looks past Caduceus into the direction he is pointing. “Yes! There is something glowing!”

“That is where we go, hold on to your memories Fjord.” Caduceus says as he grabs Fjords hand again and starts in that direction. Gratefully, the path still leads there. 

Fjord jogs to keep up. 

Suddenly the path ends, and there, glowing is a portal. 

“Ready to go home Fjord?” Caduceus asks 

“Very,” Fjord replies. 

They link hands as Caduceus holds the bracelet out and the portal opens. They jump into it, together.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had to update my tags... I wasn't expecting to write sexy times in this story... but I guess quarantine got to me... 
> 
> I also drew a picture... 
> 
> IF you don't want to read sexy times, but still want the end of the story, feel free to start it and make sure to stop when you see the drawing. 
> 
> I am debating on adding another chapter (with more sexy times)... only time will tell. 
> 
> Enjoy!

They fall and fall, for what seems like a ridiculous amount of time and then they find themselves on the deck of a ship. No, not a ship, they are on the deck of the Ball Eater, their ship.

Caduceus and Fjord both look at each other with a smile on their face, they remember their ship, they are free of the nightmare. Caduceus laughs and leads Fjord to the Captains Quarters. That has to be where their bodies were placed.

They phase through the wood of the door and there they both are, linked by a red ribbon. Their friends are all sleeping around them.

“They are all here, protecting us.” Fjord says and Caduceus can see a small tear in his eyes.

“They have protected us this entire time.” Caduceus says, just as touched that their friends haven’t left them alone at all.

“How do we get back into our bodies?” Fjord asks.

“I’m not sure… maybe…” He takes the hand of his own body. It’s weird, holding his own hand like he is. He turns his hands over in his own and starts to notice his soul is starting to fade into his body. “I think it’s working, touch yourself.”

Fjord chuckles as that, “Please don’t say that in front of Jester.” He laughs and takes his own hands following Caduceus’ lead.

Caduceus is almost all gone by this point. He has crawled upon the table and sat where his body is put, he wiggles his toes and sees the faintest wiggle in his bodies toes. It’s working. He lays down and closes his eyes. He hears Fjord say, “Caduceus, don’t leave me.”

His eyes shoot open as he takes a large gasp of breath. He sits straight up and looks to Fjord, still laying prone next to him. “Fjord?” He shakes Fjords hand, “Fjord!?”

He rummages through his component pouch to find the diamond he has there.

“Caduceus?” Jester asks, still half asleep.

“Jester! I found him, but he’s not back yet!.” Caduceus says, panic in every syllable.

This wakes Jester right up and she starts waking the others. “What do you mean, he’s not back?” She asks as she kicks Caleb awake and moves to the next.

“He is in the room, just not in his body!” Caduceus finally finds the diamond. “Ah-ha!” He turns to Fjords still prone body and places it on his chest. Jester runs over, tripping over Veth.

Caduceus starts the spell, but nothing happens, no magic flows through him. He meets Jester’s eyes. “I can’t”

Everyone is awake now and crowding around them. He feels Yasha behind him, hand on his shoulder.

“Do you have the spell Jester?” Caleb asks.

“I do… I do..” She says shaking the last vestiges of sleep from her. She places her hands on Caduceus’ and starts. Caduceus feels the magic gather and sends a quick silent prayer to the Wild Mother that they aren’t too late. He feels himself hold his breath. He feels the room hold their breaths.

Jester finishes the spell, the diamond breaks and scatters into Fjord’s chest.

The room is silent, and Caduceus wants to scream.

Fjord gasps and opens his eyes.

Caduceus can finally breath again. It feels wonderful to finally take an unhindered breath once more. The world, his world is once again right.

He watches as Fjord sits up and looks around, watches as Fjord pieces it all together and tears come to his eyes. His friends all helped correct his past mistake. Helped bring him back.

Jester sobs and Fjord pulls her into a hug. Cad’s heart aches, but he knew. Knowledge doesn’t help the hurt, though. He held onto so much hope, hope that when all was said and done, he would be the one Fjord choose. He would be first, but no, it’s Jester… Caduceus swallows the little knot of bitterness in his throat.

The Nein surround Fjord in a group hug, tears abundant and Caduceus slips from the room. He needs air. He needs to thank the Wild Mother. He needs to thank The Traveler. He needs air.

He feels the breeze hit his face. It breaks his resolve and he hears a sob break from his own chest. That sound breaks something inside and he stands alone on the deck sobbing. He’s so relieved, his heart is breathing once again, he just wishes the breaths were for him. Tears stream from his eyes and his sobs choke him.

He hears the door open behind him, hears his name.

He turns.

Fjord is standing in front of him, shirtless, the stitches he gave him, visible.

“Fjord… I’m” He starts and in seconds Fjord has closed the distance between them, has reached out and grasped the back of his neck and before Cad can figure out what is happening, Fjords lips are meeting this own. Caduceus’ body erupts in a wave of pleasure, emanating from the half-orc’s lips.

Caduceus doesn’t think to respond until Fjord starts to move away, an apology starting to form from him.

Caduceus can’t have that, he cups Fjords face gently and brings them together once again. Pleasure rolls through him. He suddenly understands what all the fuss is about. He brushes Fjords hair away from his face and pulls him closer, opening his mouth for him, trying to get just that much closer.

Fjord moans into Caduceus’ mouth and grips at him. Desire pools in Cads belly and any higher brain function he might have had, ends. He backs Fjord up against the first solid object he can find. The mast. His hands grip Fjords ass to pull him tighter against himself. His lips never leave Fjords.

Fjord wraps his legs around Caduceus’ waist and deepens the kiss, hands carding through Cads hair. Caduceus purrs, feeling Fjord’s cock between them, hard. He presses into Fjord, grinds his cock between them and Fjord arches against the mast, throwing his head back in pleasure. Caduceus kisses along his throat.

“Cad… Cad… Caduceus… sss… stop.” Fjord says, breathy and moaning.

It takes a second to register what Fjord says, but when he does he stops immediately, releasing the man completely. “I… I’m sorry, I thought… I’m so sorry.” Caduceus turns to run and hide somewhere, anywhere other then here.

Fjord catches himself easily and grabs Caduceus’ hand, bringing it close. “No, not like that.. we just… not on the deck…” he looks around half in desperation, “Follow me.”

Relief hits Caduceus and he smiles, “to the ends of the world.” And follows.

Fjord’s steps falter and he pulls Caduceus into him, “And further” Fjord says as he kisses him again, still moving.

Caduceus can only follow blindly, so caught up in Fjord that he doesn’t care where he is lead.

Fjord breaks away again and Caduceus whines until he sees what Fjord is doing. Fjord flings open the door to the Captains Quarters and pulls him inside.

Fjord is breathing heavily as he looks around, “Thank you guys, really, but I really need this room right now.” And he pulls Caduceus into him without waiting for an answer. They are kissing again. Caduceus is vaguely aware that he should be feeling embarrassed, but he loves kissing Fjord. He hears his friends spilling from the room, catches Beau saying, “Get it Fjord” before the door slams shut and they are alone once more, still kissing.

Caduceus pulls away for a breath, “Get what?” He asks between pants and he watches Fjord’s face light with mirth.

“You.” He says

“You’ve had me since day one.” Caduceus says honestly, no longer afraid. He watches as Fjord unbuttons his breaches and slides onto his bed, not breaking eye contact.

“Then come to me.” Fjord says, laying back on his bed, presenting himself as an invitation, and what an invitation it is. Caduceus’ mouth goes dry as he looks at Fjord, beautiful green skin taunt over a lithe musculature. Eyes, blown, mouth wet and open, hair tussled. He looks so alive, and Caduceus’ breath catches for a second. He is alive. He steps forward, but his steps falter as his nerves slam into him.

Worry falls on Fjords face and he sits up. “Cad?” He says.

“I… I’ve… never…” Cad stutters and Fjord is off the bed in an instant and coming to Caduceus’ side.

“What’s wrong Caduceus, are we… moving too fast?”

“No” Caduceus says desperately, flashes of Fjord lying dead go through his mind. He reaches out and pulls Fjord into him. He’s alive, he’s warm, he’s his. He breaths Fjord in and collects himself. “I’ve never done this before, I… don’t know how. I want to, but I don’t want to hurt you or mess up in some way…”

He feels Fjord chuckle against him and feels Fjord take his hand, remove his gloves, and kiss his bare knuckles. “Is that all?” He asks as he turns them around and kisses Caduceus once again. “We don’t have to tonight, just don’t leave me…”

“I just got you back.” Caduceus says, removing his other glove, “I will never leave you alone again.” He says, tipping Fjords face to meet his own. He kisses him again, slowly, deeply. He hears Fjords breath hitch in his chest and smooths his hands down Fjord’s back. Fjord arches into him. He breaks the kiss, “I want to… will you… show me?”

Fjord smiles and slides his hands under Caduceus’ tunic, pushing it open and off his shoulders. A shiver runs through Caduceus and he as Fjord’s eyes darken and he says, “gladly”. Fjord kisses the revealed flesh, rubs his face along the downy soft fur that covers Caduceus’ body. The tunic falls to the ground and Caduceus purrs deep in his chest. Fjord’s hands explore and Caduceus arches into the touch.

Fjord leads him to his bed and sits him on it. “Lay back” he says and Caduceus follows the order. Fjord joins him, laying next to him, and kisses him again.

Caduceus luxuriates in the attention. He takes his time running his hands along as much green flesh as he can, sees what touches can make Fjord moan into him. Fjord moves his kisses to trail down Caduceus’ jaw, then his neck and Caduceus arches at the new pleasure, moaning Fjord’s name. He feels the half orc smile as he continues his way down to his chest. He sucks and pinches at his nipples before continuing down. Caduceus spares a second to register a bit of embarrassment at how much of a quivering mess he is. He doesn’t even notice when Fjord unlaces his breaches until there is a gasp and Fjord is still.

Caduceus manages to sit up a little and look down to Fjord, “Fjord? What’s wrong?” He asks. Fjord is still, eyes wide, mouth open. He is staring. Caduceus follows Fjords gaze, he is staring at Cad’s cock. “Fjord?”

Fjord’s eyes almost glaze over as he wrenches his eyes away from Caduceus’ cock up to Caduceus’ eyes. He has to swallow a few times before he can talk, “You’re so… Big.” He says and practically moans on the word big.

Caduceus looks at himself. He honestly wouldn’t know if he is bigger then most, he shrugs, “I’m normal for a Firbolg, well at least I am when compared to my family. Am… Am I too big?” A bit of worry starts to enter Caduceus, he just got Fjord, he doen’t want to loose him now.

He watches as Fjord licks his lips as his gaze lands once more on his erection. “You’re perfect,” he says as he reaches out to touch. Caduceus jolts when Fjord grips him. Fjord moans when his hand doesn’t fit fully around. He leans down and drags his tongue along the length and moans again. Caduceus feels like his whole body is on fire, he reaches down to move Fjords hair from his face, he wants to watch Fjords face, even though he is having a hard time keeping his eyes open.

Fjord grips him in both hands and smiles at Caduceus before he opens his mouth and descends on the tip of Caduceus’ cock. Caduceus yelps at the sensation and bucks up into Fjords mouth, who chokes and drools down Cad’s shaft, but doesn’t retreat. Instead Fjord takes a breath, hollows his cheeks, and sucks. Caduceus groans and clutches the headboard of Fjord’s bed, trying to focus on keeping his hips from bucking up. Fjord holds his breath and forces himself to take more of Caduceus in his mouth. Caduceus has never felt anything like this, and doesn’t want it to stop, he feels himself hit the back of Fjords throat and then slide deeper. Fjord swallows and Caduceus almost looses it.

Caduceus swats at Fjords shoulder, “I’m… not… gonna…. Much…. Longer.” He basically chokes on his own spit as he tires to warn Fjord.

Fjord seems to get the hint and backs off, releasing him with a messy, wet pop.

Caduceus manages to open his eyes again when Fjord releases him and the picture he is met with almost makes him cum. Fjord is flushed, mouth swollen and dripping, his eyes full of unshed tears from effort. There is still saliva that connects Fjords mouth with his swollen cock. Fjord looks satisfied and hungry and moves up Caduceus body to kiss him messily. Caduceus has absolutely no complaints.

Fjord breaks from the kiss, “Cad…” his voice is husky and cracked, it goes directly to Caduceus’ cock which twitches. Fjord feels it and smirks. He clears his throat and tries again. “I..” He swallows, “I need you inside me…” and he kisses Caduceus.

Caduceus grabs a hold of Fjords ass and pulls him into his body, grinds Fjord against his stomach. Fjord pulls away to finish what he was going to say.

“I… need to… stretch myself…” he nuzzeles against Caduceus’ chin. Cad purrs at the drag of his facial hair against his own. Fjord pulls away and Caduceus whines high in the back of his throat. “I just need a minuet…” He looks back down at caduceus’ erection, “maybe two.” Then turns, frantically searching for something.

Caduceus enjoys the picture before him and shimmies free from his breaches. Every movement seems to catch Fjords undivided attention, stopping him from his search. Caduceus has to lay still before Fjord can collect himself enough to finish his task.

Fjord yells in triumph before producing a bottle of oil and ridding himself of any left over clothes on his body.

Caduceus positions himself so he is propped up a little and able to see Fjord clearly. He watches as Fjord splays his legs and dips his fingers into the oil. He watches as Fjord moves his fingers to his backside. It takes Caduceus a moment to identify what he was doing, but when he does, he moans at the sight of it and lazily strokes his cock.

Fjord almost spills the oil watching Caduceus stoke himself and Caduceus lets out a small laugh. “Come here Fjord, let me do that for you.” He says, reaching out for Fjord.

Fjord starts to move before he thinks about it, eyes still trained on Cad’s bobbing cock. He stills and shakes his head, “You said you don’t know how?”

“I said I never had sex with someone before.” He clarifies.

“Huh?” Fjord says, trying to get some blood back in his brain.

Cad smiles, “I was alone in the Blooming Grove for a long while, Fjord. It’s amazing what you do when board to pass the time. Come here, I’ll be gentle.”

Fjords face goes slack with pure desire and he allows Caduceus to man handle him onto all fours over him so he can be prepped. Caduceus dips a finger in the oil, “I’m going to start, tell me if it’s too much.” And he gently places his finger along Fjords crack and presses, massaging the skin. Fjord moans deeply as Caduceus spreads him open and swirls a finger around his opening, barely adding any pressure, just getting him used to the sensation.

“Tell me?” Fjord asks.

Caduceus adds a little pressure, testing. “Tell you what?”

Fjord groans again, his head so close to Caduceus’ cock. “Tell me of your alone time in the Blooming Grove. Tell me how… how you know how to …”

Caduceus holds Fjord’s cheeks apart and breathes over him, “I can’t.”

“Why” Fjord basically whines.

“I need my mouth for other things.” Cad says as he licks his tongue along Fjord’s center.

Fjord makes a choked pleasure sound and looses his ability to hold himself aloft. He keens and pushes back against Cad’s tongue.

“Holy Shit!” Fjord exclaims.

Cad smiles against him as his tongue circles his entrance, glad he thought of it. He takes Fjord’s hands and moves them to his own backside. Fjord takes the hint and holds himself open for Caduceus, clenching his ass in his hands. He whines as Caduceus blows air across him again. Caduceus sucks at him and pushes his tongue inside. Fjord bucks and grinds his ass back towards Cad. Cad slicks his finger and pushes it along side his tongue. When his finger is inserted, he pulls his face back and nibbles on Fjord’s ass cheek.

Fjord is breathing heavily now, panting against Cad’s legs as he holds himself spread open. Cad slowly opens him, using one finger, then two. Caduceus fucks Fjord open slowly, kissing and licking when Fjord seems a little too complacent.

“Gods, what… did… you…. ahhhhh…. do… in that…. mmmmmm…. grove of yours?” Fjord asks.

Caduceus adds a third and Fjord is so gone, he doesn’t even seem to notice the stretch. “I got creative.” Is all Caduceus says and it makes Fjord moan.

Fjord lets go of himself and tries to steady himself. “I’m done…. If you keep going, I’m going to cum without your cock inside me.”

“You really should allow one more finger, I don’t want you to get hurt.” Caduceus says looking down at himself and wondering if it’s possible for Fjord to take all of him.

“Please Caduceus, I am prepped enough.” Fjord says and Caduceus stops, pulling his hand free with a squelching noise. Fjord whines at the loss.

Fjord shakily turns and kisses Caduceus deeply. Cad cards his clean hand through Fjord’s hair earning a breathy sigh. He smiles as Fjord backs away and positions himself. He pours some oil over Caduceus and he moans at the touch., forcing himself not to buck up into Fjord’s hands.

He helps Fjord position himself over his cock, puts his hands on Fjord’s hips to steady him and watches as Fjord slowly takes him within his body. Caduceus throws his head back in a deep groan as Fjord stretches slowly around him. He has to force himself still when Fjord stills, breathing, adjusting, before slowly continuing. Caduceus watches and groans as Fjord takes him inch, by inch, by agonizing inch. He has never felt anything more perfect in his life, and then Fjord takes him in a little more and that is the most perfect he has ever felt.

Fjords not even half way down when they are both panting and sweaty. Caduceus feels absolutely wrecked but sees’ Fjords erection has softened, it’s only at half mast. “Fjord… we can stop… Please… don’t… don’t hurt yourself.” He reaches out and smooths his hair from his face, cups his jaw, “You have… al… already been so… perfect for me.”

Fjord moans and bounces himself a little further down, making Caduceus go a little deeper. It makes Cad moan involuntary. Fjord opens his eyes and pulls Caduceus into a kiss. He looks into his eyes and says, “I will… take you all…. tonight….even.” He takes a breath, “I need you, Caduceus… I need… your cock…. inside… You make…. Me feel… completely alive.” And he bounces a little deeper. Cad’s eyes close at the spike of pleasure.

Caduceus strokes Fjord’s face, down his neck, along his shoulders, down his sides, he touches Fjord wherever he can and Fjord leans into the touches as he slowly bounces up and further down on Caduceus’ cock. Cad moans at each movement, but dares not move. He doesn’t want to hurt Fjord, not during sex, not ever.

With one final bounce, Fjord is fully seated on Caduceus, sweaty and panting. Cad gasps at the feeling of Fjord all around him, clamping around his cock. Every shift of his body weight is magnified as pleasure in his cock.

Caduceus still dares not move until Fjord says it’s ok, even though he wants nothing more then to rut against him. “Fjord… are you ok.” He manages to say through strangled breaths.

Fjord is gasping and he looks up at Caduceus through hooded eyes, he licks his lips and Cadueuces’ cock jumps inside of him. Fjord feels it and moans. “I’ve never felt so full… so… complete. UHhhhhHHh, Cad… you feel soooo GOoooOod.” Fjord adjusts himself and then starts to move.

The constriction, the drag, the everything that Fjord is, is making Caduceus see nothing but stars.

Fjord braces himself on Caduceus’s chest and starts bouncing in earnest and Cad arches in pure bliss. His hands are back to Fjord’s hips guiding him. One hand goes to Fjords face and he leans his head into it, turns and kisses Cads wrist. Caduceus moves beneath Fjord and soon Fjord is hard again, cock bobbing on every bounce. Caduceus palms it and makes Fjord’s rhythm falter. Cad strokes it and a full body shiver runs through Fjord, Cad feels Fjord’s walls clamp down on him and it makes him growl.

Fjord moans and his rhythm slows, exhaustion starting to take over from the strain. Caduceus carefully changes their position, making sure there is a plethora of pillows under Fjords head. “You’ve done so much.” He kisses Fjord deeply. “I got you… Comfortable?”

Fjord nods and says with a lazy smile, and stretches. Caduceus watches every muscle of flex under him and has to swallow. Fjord stokes his own cock and says, “Fuck me with your giant cock Cad.”

Cad chuckles at that and starts with some tiny thrusts, just to get used to the motion. He pulls back further and pushes into Fjord with a little more force. Fjord moans at the sensation, so he does it again, pulling out a little further. He tries to hold onto the precipice he finds himself on.

“Harder.” Fjord demands and Caduceus obeys. He pulls almost all the way out from Fjords body and slams himself back in. Fjord’s back bows and he moans, “Yes, just like that.”

Caduceus busies himself with doing just that. He pulls out almost to the tip and slams back until his balls slap on Fjord’s ass. It feels amazing. He repositions Fjord so he can have a little more leverage, pulling Fjords legs up, resting them on his shoulders then grabbing Fjords waist. He pulls out and pounds back in, starting up a rhythm of grunts and moans.

He watches as Fjord squirms and arches beneath him, moaning, “Yes Cad, Like that…ooooo sooo good, mmmm YES!” And he quickens his pace. Fjord tangles his hands in the sheets beneath him and gets louder in his praise, “Gods. Sooooo, umph… uhhhh. CAD… YES… uhhhh FASTER… JUST LIKE THAT!!!! YES!!’

Caduceus obeys and thrusts completely in and out faster and faster, harder and harder. He hears his skin slap against Fjord, hears his cock squelch inside Fjord, hears Fjord repeating his name in ecstasy and tries to hold onto his sanity. He changes angle for a better grip and Fjord screams. “FUCK YES!! THAT!!” And Caduceus obeys. He is not sure how much longer he can last, he is holding on by a thread.

He watches as Fjords cock bobs on each thrust and reaches out for it. He starts stroking it in time with his thrusts and Fjord gets louder, his movements get less graceful. “HhhhAaaaaa, CAD!!… soooooo….mmmmmmm.. so close….” Fjord says.

Cad tightens his grip of Fjords cock and plows into Fjords rear. Fjord arches off of the bed, screaming Caduceus’ name as ribbons of cum explode from him. Fjord’s walls clamp down on him and his back arches and he is coming with a scream of Fjord’s name. He feels himself filling fjord up with his cum, aftershocks racing though his body, then he collapses, angling himself just enough to not fall on top of Fjord.

They lay like that, with Caduceus still mostly inside him, catching their breaths. Fjord cups Caduceus’ face and kisses him gently.

Caduceus has never been so happy in his entire life.

With a groan and a whimper, Caduceus eases himself gently from Fjords’s body and rises. Fjord starts to complain, but then notices the rag and settles. Caduceus cleans Fjord up. It’s easy, Fjord is so pliable and stays where he is put. He must be exhausted. Caduceus is gentle when cleaning up the mess Caduceus made of his rear. He has to remember to cast a cure wounds on him tomorrow.

Caduceus makes quick work of cleaning himself up and then crawls back into bed with Fjord. He curls around Fjord entwining their legs and their hands. He holds Fjord close and peppers soft kisses over him.

Fjord smiles and looks at Caduceus, “Caduceus Clay, I might just be smitten with you.” He kisses Caduceus’ nose before nuzzling deeper.

Caduceus warms at the confession and complement. He tucks Fjords hair behind his ear, “Smitten, I think I might just like that word. Smitten… If it means what I think it does, I might just be smitten right back.”

Fjord laughs and curls in closer to Caduceus.

Caduceus’ eyes start to get heavy and he pulls Fjord closer.

Soon both are in a deep, contented, safe, sleep.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last Chapter! 
> 
> Thanks to everyone who left comments and kudos!

Caduceus wakes the next morning very well rested. He smiles to himself remembering the night before and stretches his limbs. He opens his eyes to find Fjord, still curled up and cuddled next to him. He settles back against him and runs gentle fingers along Fjords curled up arm. 

“Mmmm’s nice” Fjord says in his half dreaming state. 

Caduceus lines his face up with Fjords and nuzzles their noses together. “Good morning Fjord. How do you feel?”

Fjords eyes open a tiny crack and he smiles. He brings one hand up to caress Caduceus’ face. “Morning.” He says and then brings their lips together. 

Caduceus lingers a tiny bit and then pulls back, “How do you feel?”

“Happy.” Fjord says as he stretches, and then winces a little. 

Caduceus leans in again and kisses him, casting cure wounds. “I’m sorry.” He says and Fjord shushes him. 

“It’s a good pain,” he says, “But it feels better now.” He amends as he cards his hands through Caduceus’s hair. “Everything is so much better.”

Caduceus blushes and kisses Fjord lazily. He feels interest stir between them, and the kiss deepens. 

Caduceus pulls away when Fjord goes to reach for his newly awakened cock, “I’m… I’m not sure we should so recently after last night.” He says but then moans into Fjords touch as Fjord grinds them together. 

They kiss. 

Fjord breaks the kiss and assures Caduceus, “There is so much more that we can do, plus, you just healed me right up.” And kisses him again before he could reply. 

Caduceus wonders if this is how it will always be, and cannot find it in himself to mind. He would have, before he met Fjord. The shear idea of being intimate with another person was enough to horrify, but now… he can think of nothing else he would rather do. He runs his hands up the length of Fjords body and cups his face. Fjord rolls them over so he is on top, straddling Caduceus. “Tell me.” He demands. 

“There is so much I can tell, what do you want to know?”

Fjord kisses down his neck, sucking a bruise into his collar. “Tell me of your time in the Blooming Grove.”

Caduceus luxuriates in touching Fjord and in being touched. He runs his hands up and down green thighs, sometimes using the pads of his fingers, others, his nails. Fjord squirms when he uses his nails. 

“I grew up there, it’s where my family has resided for generations. Hopefully, it is now saved and flourishing.” He says simply. 

Fjord bites his neck. Caduceus yelps and bucks up into Fjord’s weight. 

Interesting.

Fjord looks at him, “You know what I mean…” He kisses down to his chest, “how did you know your tongue would feel… so good.” He sucks on one of Cad’s nipples. 

Caduceus groans and runs his hands up Fjord’s arms, “I didn’t, I figured your tongue felt so good on me, that it would probably feel that good on you.” Caduceus arches his back a little, and moans when Fjord pinches and rolls his other nipple between his fingers. 

“Caduceus…” Fjord whines into his chest, looking up at him through his eyelashes. 

It finally dawns on him, “Ohh, you want a story about my masturbatory explorations.” And he feels Fjord laugh against him. 

“Gods, is this what loving you is going to be like?” Fjord says quietly. 

Caduceus cups his face and leans in to place a kiss upon him. “Probably” he says honestly. “You can…” Caduceus swallows, “You can always back out. I hear it’s a thing that happens quite often.” Caduceus hates offering and has no idea what he would do if Fjord took him up on it, but…

“Never” Fjord says with conviction and kisses him deeply. When he pulls back he says, “Now tell me your dirties ‘masturbatory exploration’ story.” 

“Dirtiest as in actual dirt, or…” Caduceus smiles. 

“Cad…” Fjord whines and bites a mark onto Caduceus’ chest. 

Cad moans a little and moves Fjords hair out of his face. “I could tell you about the time I … learned that men can derive pleasure from anal stimulation, or … when I created my own stimulation tool because I could find nothing … suitable. Would one of those suffice as ‘dirty’ enough?”

Fjord sits up, thinking about which story he would like to hear, and Caduceus uses the time to lean in and mirror what Fjord had just done. He kisses Fjord’s neck, and sucks a little bruise onto his skin. Fjord leans into it with a quiet moan. Caduceus smiles against his skin and kisses down his neck to his chest. He runs a nail over one nipple and sucks on the other. Fjord groans and arches into Caduceus’ touch, draping his arms around his neck. 

“You made your own dildo?” Fjord asks and moans as Caduceus breathes over his wet flesh. “ Why?”

Caduceus trails his nails down Fjords back earning a high pitched sound from the back of Fjords throat that ends in a groan. 

“Where else would I have gotten one?” Caduceus says against Fjords chest. 

“Mmm, good point…” Fjord says, running his hands through Caduceus’ hair. 

Caduceus grabs Fjords ass and hauls him closer, making the half orc kneel before him. He trails kisses down his belly. He places another small love bite on Fjord’s hip, then kisses across and captures Fjords hard cock between his lips. 

Fjord groans, draping himself over Caduceus. 

Caduceus uses one hand to grip Fjords base and sucks on the tip. Fjord groans out his name, adding syllables, drawing it out. It makes Caduceus smile around him. 

Caduceus uses his tongue to swirl around the tip before he tries to take more of Fjord into his mouth. He can almost get all of him in and he sucks, using his other hand to grip and rotate, as if he were pleasuring himself. 

Fjord jolts in Caduceus’ arms and groans, thrusting his hips forward. Caduceus steadies him and bobs his head, feeling the slick length of Fjord slide between his lips, feeling his own spit leaving his mouth to drip down his chin. He captures that spit in his hand and uses it to ease the friction against Fjord’s cock. Its obscene and just the action makes Caduceus moan around him. Fjords shivers at the sensation. 

Caduceus picks up speed and sucks harder. He lets go of Fjords hips, allowing him to thrust into his mouth and cups Fjords balls in his hands. He gently massages them and Fjords’ small thrusts falter, then speed up.

Caduceus opens his throat and allows Fjord to thrust as hard and as deeply as he wishes and soon, Fjord is clutching at Caduceus shoulders and yelling his name, spurting cum down his throat. Caduceus tries to swallow as much as he can, but some still manages to slip free and dribble down his chin. 

Fjord slips himself from Caduceus’ lips with a groan. He sits himself back down on Caduceus’ lap and kisses him, cleaning himself off of Caduceus’ face as he does so. 

“You were supposed to tell me a story, not suck me off.” He tells Caduceus when he rests their forehands together.

“Sorry, you were just taking so long trying to make a decision.” Caduceus says, sounding anything but apologetic. 

Fjord laughs in the space between them and kisses him again. His hands roam Caduceus’ body, teasing lightly along his skin. 

“Are you going to tell me a story Caduceus?” Fjord asks when he pulls back. 

“Well, that depends.” 

“On what?”

“Entirely on you.” Caduceus says with a grin. 

“Oh really.” Fjord says as he slides down Caduceus’ body, “And what exactly do I have to do to earn a story?”

Caduceus smiles and there is a glint in his eye that Fjord is not used to seeing. “Well, I’ll tell you the first half, and then, if you last the whole rest of the day, I’ll tell you the last.”

“Sounds easy.” Fjord says as he starts idly stroking Caduceus’s cock.

“We’ll see.” Caduceus says as he moves to get his pouch. 

Fjord frowns a little, but settles when Caduceus sits back on the bed. “You see Fjord, the first item I made, was out of sheer curiosity. I had an idea, and I needed to see if that idea could be proven.” 

Fjord watches him sort through his pouch and make himself comfortable. Fjord reaches for Caduceus’ cock again and strokes it lazily. Caduceus’ eyes close in pleasure and he hums his approval. Fjord cups Caduceus’ balls and massages them in his hand and Cad’s mouth hangs open and lets a small moan out. 

Caduceus swallows and opens his eyes when his hand finds what he is looking for. He pulls it free of the bag. Fjord leans forward to get a better view, still stroking. 

“It’s not the biggest I made, nor the prettiest, but, it serves it’s purpose.” Caduceus says. 

“And what purpose is that?” Fjord asks and watches as Caduceus’ smile gets larger. 

“Come here.” Caduceus says and Fjord obeys. Caduceus puts the small penis shaped object in Fjord hands. “I was curious if I could use thaumaturgy to make that small piece of earth, rumble.:”

Fjord turns it over in his hands, the base of it is splayed out so it wouldn’t get lost… He looks at Caduceus. “Can you?”

Caduceus says the words and the little piece of earth in Fjords hands starts to vibrate. Fjords eyes get wide and he looks up to Caduceus, mouth open. 

“Would you like to try it?” Caduceus asks. 

Fjord can only shake his head. Yes, he would like to very much. 

Caduceus kisses him messily, maneuvering Fjord closer, “Do you remember where we put the oil?” He asks between kisses. 

Fjord points over his shoulder and Caduceus retrieves it, mischief glinting in his eyes. Fjord is still playing with the piece of smooth stone when Caduceus gets back to him, and stands before him. He can feel Fjords eyes roam his body and tries to stifle a shiver that goes through him. Fjord smiles and pulls him closer, wrapping his arms around his torso and positioning him standing before him. From his still seated position, Fjord takes hold of Caduceus’ cock and licks it from base to tip. It pulls a moan from Caduceus as he arches his back. 

Fjord’s smile gets larger and he runs his tongue around the head then along the frenulum and Caduceus almost chokes on the jolt of pleasure it sends through him. Fjord laughs and takes the oil form him. Caduceus’ runs his fingers through Fjords hair and groans. 

Fjord opens the oil pouring some in one hand before putting it beside the bed where it won’t get knocked over. He then spreads the oil over both hands and takes Caduceus in hand once more. 

Cad revels in the feeling of Fjords’ slick hands over him. He looks down and watches as his hands stroke him, linking together to strok his full girth. He hums in satisfaction. Fjord unlinks his hands and manurers Cad to his mouth again, this time opening his mouth and bouncing Cad’s tip on his tongue. Cad steadies himself on Fjords shoulders and Fjord reaches one of his hands back to fondle Caduceus’ balls, before sucking on the tip, pulling another groan from Caduceus. Fjord uses his other slick hand to grasp as much as he can and start stroking from his lips to his other hand. 

Caduceus runs his fingers through Fjords hair and Fjord hums, sending another jolt though Cad, almost making his knees buckle. Fjord stops sucking the tip to place open mouth kisses along his shaft and tonguing at the veins. He drags his tongue back up and plays with the neck before sucking the tip again. 

Caduceus lets his head fall back enjoying what Fjord is doing to him and feels a long deep groan come up form his rib cage. Fjord takes this as approval and tightness his fist, adding more pressure, and stroking him faster. He opens his mouth wider, and tries to take more of him inside. Caduceus feels the pressure inside building and tries to steady his hips from any small thrusting movements.

Caduceus moans and looks dow at Fjord. He feels a jolt ride through him as he takes Fjord in, his lips stretched around him, drool dripping down his chin, being smeared along his cock with the oil, his green hands gripping at him, stroking him, twisting him. Fjord makes eye contact and lets his eyelids droop as he moans in pleasure around Caduceus’ cock. That’s all it took. Without warning Caduceus cums with a shout. Fjord’s eyes widen in surprise as he tries to swallow, but it is too much. Caduceus watches as his cum leaks from Fjords mouth, watches Fjord pull off of him to swallow his mouthful, and watches as he paints Fjords face and chest with the remainder. 

Caduceus is bent over Fjord, gasping for breath, “I… I’m so… Sorry…. Fjord.”

Fjord finishes swallowing and looks up at him. He smiles and licks his lips trying to capture some that had escaped. 

Caduceus’ cock jumps at the sight, trying to refill, and he groans. “Sss… stop that…. I… can’t handle…. it.” Caduceus says as leans down and kisses Fjord, tasting himself as he deepens the kiss. 

Fjord moans into him, looping his arm around Caduceus’ neck and pulling him down until his is on top of him. He arches up into him and Caduceus feels Fjord’s hardness against his stomach. He chuckles and runs his hand through the slick before grasping Fjords cock. Fjord yelps into the kiss and arches against him. 

Caduceus deepens the kiss as he tighten his hold and stokes with intent. Fjord squirms beneath him, moaning into the kisses, arching into his touch. Caduceus breaks the kiss and kisses along Fjords jawbone, nipping at the bone then soothing it with his tongue, Fjord keens into the touch. Caduceus moves to kissing down Fjords neck, biting at the juncture of neck to shoulder and sucking a bruise into he skin there. Fjord groans and clutches at him, saying his name over and over, almost like a litany. 

Caduceus strokes and twists his wrist at the head of Fjod’s cock and he bites at the bruise he made. Fjords whole body stiffens right before he yells and explodes between them, spent. 

Caduceus lazily strokes him through the aftermath and then lays him down gently. He kisses Fjords forehead before going to retrieve a clean cloth to clean them both up with. 

He returns to Fjord and cleans them both telling Fjord how wonderful and perfect he is as he does so. 

Fjord murmurs something, then swallows and tries again, “We forgot your toy…” 

Caduceus laughs quietly, and leans down to Fjords ear, “I did not, do you still want to play today?” 

Fjord groans and looks at him, a smile on his face, “I’m a little spent right now” Fjord laughs, “But, I would like to…. Feel it… yes.”

Caduceus kisses him, “I’ll let you recover before I start playing.” He says and he kisses him again. Fjord pulls him closer, deepening the kiss. 

Caduceus moves Fjord onto his stomach and kisses the back of his neck, “I’ll be gentle.” He says as he retrieves the oil and coats his fingers. 

Fjord is still pretty stretched from last night, but Caduceus is still very through, making sure he doesn’t hurt him at all. Fjord moans at Cad’s touch. Caduceus pulls his fingers free and coats the stone in oil. “I’m going to insert it now, tell me if it hurts, ok?”

“Ok.” Fjord replies and Caduceus slowly inserts the stone butt plug. Fjord groans at the intrusion, but when Caduceus is done, he turns and kisses him again. 

“I can almost go another round if you’re up for it.” Fjord tells Caduceus. 

Caduceus deepens their kiss and runs his hands along Fjords flesh moaning at the prospect. 

Fjord encircles Caduceus’ neck with his arms pulling the firbolg closer when there is a loud knock at the door, startling them both apart. 

“Fjord, will you please stop fucking Caduceus and get your ASS OUT HERE!!” Beau bellows, “The ship needs her captain!”

Caduceus chuckles, a light blush on his cheeks as he gathers theirs clothes. 

Fjord’s face deepends in color as well. He clears his throat, “I’ll be right there!” He yells and looks to Caduceus who is already holding his clothes out to him, “Raincheck?”

Caduceus smiles and nods his head as he puts his own pants back on. “Yes.” He says as he leans over and captures Fjord’s lips once more. Fjord happily returns the kiss while trying to dress. They have to separate from each other to finish dressing. When finished they stand before each other. Caduceus fixes Fjords hair and Fjord smooths down Caduceus’ jacket. 

“Umm,” Fjord starts shyly, “Uhh, thanks… for… well for everything, and thanks for coming to get me…”

“I will always come and get you, Fjord. I did it as much for you as myself.” Caduceus says with a smile.

Fjord laughs and says, “And thanks for… well for.” He motions towards the bed and Caduceus laughs. 

“Thank you for that as well… hopefully there will be more.”

“Ohh yes, there will be.” Fjord says. 

Caduceus turns to leave the room and Fjord stops him, “Cad?”

“What’s wrong Fjord?” 

“I… need to tell you something, and… I need to ask you something.”

“Ok.”

“I’ve always…. I mean… I’d like to think that… umm….” Fjord fiddles with the strings on his armor. “What I’m trying to say is…. I loved you before you saved me… last night, it wasn’t because you saved me, I’ve wanted to… for a while now.”

A warmth blossoms in Caduceus chest and he feels like he is glowing, “I have too, which was scary for me. I never wanted to before… you.”

Fjord looks relieved and smiles fully. Caduceus returns the smile and they kiss. 

When they part to leave Fjord asks, “Umm Cad? How does this…. Stone… work?”

Caduceus just smiles and casts Thaumaturgy. Once the spell is cast he watches as Fjord folds down onto himself with a groan. He tries to steady himself and look at Caduceus, When he finally does right himself, his mouth is open in a silent sigh of pleasure, and there is a slight bulge in his pants. “Ohhh…”

Caduceus stops the spell and smiles, opening the door to the deck, “Get through all day with me playing with you, and you might get the full story tonight.” And Caduceus winks at him as he steps through the door and waits for Fjord to follow. 

Fjord swallows and steadies his legs. He steps through the threshold and says with a smile, “You’ve brought me back just to kill me all over again, haven’t you?”

“No” Caduceus says, “But if I had, what a way to go.” He finishes and closes the door. 

Fjord chuckles, shaking his head, and walks over to where Beau is waiting for him with a grin. 

Caduceus smiles and heads off to cook the crew some lunch to apologize for monopolizing their captain. While cooking he thinks of all the wonderful ways he can torture Fjord into locking them both in his quarters until the journey is over. 

Caduceus chuckles to himself and says, “This is going to be so much fun.”


End file.
